


Vir Suledin

by Lafaiette



Series: Var Lath Vir Suledin [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Post Trespasser
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-06
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-07-12 18:19:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 34,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7117309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lafaiette/pseuds/Lafaiette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are lanterns hanging from the archways which provide warm light and entertainment to the small moths. Playful fireflies complete the mosaics, filling the missing parts with their delicate golden flight, and the frescoes can still tell their story with grace and elegance under the light of the moon and the one cast by the lanterns. </p><p>It feels like home.</p><p>Direct sequel to <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/4891531">Var Lath</a>. Lavellan stays in Solas' base, hoping to find with him a new way to save the Elven people and all Thedas. Their friends will help too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Crown For The Victor

**Author's Note:**

> Since this is a direct sequel to the previous fic, I highly suggest to read [that one](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4891531) first!

The good smell of food wakes her up.

She is still in Solas’ room, a heavy, dark fur draped over her to keep her warm. He is standing in front of his desk, stirring the soup he brought for her.

He is still wearing his torn shirt and pants, the armor forgotten on the floor, and for a moment it’s like everything is back to normal, like the old days at Skyhold.

But they are not in the ancient stronghold, she didn’t forget that. She looks at the unfamiliar room again, at the desk in front of the roaring fireplace, at the elven frescoes he has been recoloring and fixing…

… and smiles, because after all this is not so much different from Skyhold. It smells like him, like home, and the stuffed wolf she sewed for him stands proud and happy on the pile of documents on his desk.

“ _Ma vhenan_.” Solas calls, smiling at her from above his shoulder. “Your food got cold. I made sure to make it appetizing again.”

She smiles in return and feels her face turn red.

“Thank you.”

His smile broadens and he brings the tray to the bed, placing it near her thigh. She sees the bowl of soup, fresh bread, a pitcher of water and a pastry coming straight from the Free Marches, one of her favorites.

She gasps, her face lightning up. She can’t remember the last time she ate one and she reaches out for it first.

Solas playfully swats her hand and whispers, leaning close to her face: “Leave the pastry for last, _ma sa’lath_. You will enjoy it more.”

“Aww!” She eyes it with longing, but the soup looks delicious too and after such a good rest - during which Solas _finally_ stayed with her in her dreams and ran with her in a forest as a wolf -, she feels ravenous and would eat anything.

So she pretends to be annoyed - pouting at Solas for a moment -, then happily grabs the spoon, dips it in the dense soup, and raises it to sip it.

Only to gasp and grimace as soon as her right arm moves.

Solas immediately takes her hand and lowers her nightgown to check the gauzes on her arm. The wound hasn’t opened and the gauzes are still clean, but her skin burns and itches.

Even though he managed to remove the powerful toxin from her body, it was still a serious hit which weakened her greatly and her arm hasn’t recovered yet.

“Let me help you.” he says softly, almost a timid whisper, and she remembers again how much time has passed since they saw each other in the flesh. She thinks of all the times she sensed him in her dreams, of the gifts they exchanged over the months, of Enasalin’s help to ensure they could establish a new dialogue, of Solas’ pain and burden, of his loneliness over the millennia and the love they have for each other…

… and then tears fill her eyes, tears of sorrow, fatigue, relief and love all mixed together.

She sniffles, trying to hold them back, but Solas sees them and pales. He looks horrified and guilty, so, so guilty and he cups her cheek, stroking the space where her _vallaslin_ used to be with his thumb. He is about to cry too and she doesn’t want that.

So she smiles, forces back her tears, and kisses the palm of his hand, saying softly:

“My love, I am here. I am finally here.”

He chokes on a sob, the same wail from before slipping through his chapped lips, and then he hides his face on her lap, wrapping his arms around her waist tightly, refusing to let her go.

She takes a deep breath, heart fluttering in her chest. That’s what she wants, what she needs: to hold him and be held by him in return and never be apart from each other again.

“ _Ma vhenan_.” Solas murmurs, his voice filled with tears muffled against her body. “Oh, _ma vhenan_!”

Her only hand caresses his bald head, slowly, remembering the movements she used when they cuddled like this in their room in the highest tower of Skyhold. There is a point, right on the nape of his neck, which made him relax and mumble contently.

She touches him there and his sobs punctually subside, until his breathing is heavy, but not interrupted by those wails she can’t bear to hear him make.

When he raises his head, he isn’t crying anymore - although his eyes are very red - and Scarlet smiles at him, giggling when he kisses her eyes and forehead and nose.

Then he kisses her mouth and she falls against his body, melting in his arms and finding respite and relief in them.

“Here.” he says, finally smiling as well. He takes the spoon, dips it into the still steaming soup and slowly lifts it. “I will feed you.”

They did this too during the time of the Inquisition, either when they caught a bad cold or were severely wounded and couldn’t eat by themselves.

He fed her many times, since she was reckless in battle, but not sturdy enough to win the fights with just a few bruises. But she remembers clearly all the times she fed him too, those days when he was too weak due to bloodloss to even move his head or fever made him dizzy and sleepy.

They fed each other even when they were perfectly fine. It was a domestic, sweet way to play, eat, and be together and Scarlet’s face always got so red and she couldn’t stop laughing, especially when Solas grinned in that roguish, boyish way and…

She missed those days. She has thought about that happiness every hour, every minute, every second in the past, long months and now the chance to finally have them again has appeared, offered by the sacrifice of that poor agent.

“I missed this.” Solas says, as if he read her mind. His smile is gentle, touched, and his eyes are kind and filled with warmth. He reminds her of the beautiful wolf statues in the Emerald Graves and she wonders how she never noticed how similar they were.

Even the ears are the same.

She giggles and Solas blinks, blushes, and instantly starts looking for whatever stupid thing he did.

He apologizes, carefully studies the spoon and her face, thinking he hit her with it - it happened in the past -, then he looks at the bowl and the tray, but finds nothing out of the ordinary.

Scarlet giggles again as his face gets beetle red and she kisses him, taking him by surprise so much that this time the spoon really bumps against her jaw, leaving an orange spot of soup on it.

“I missed this too.” she says as they break the kiss. “I missed _you_ , _ma sa’lath_.”

Solas’ eyes are half-closed and his mouth is still open, lips glistening. He sniffles, nuzzles her nose, steals another kiss, then takes another spoonful of soup.

“And I missed you. Terribly. Tremendously.” He chuckles. “Now eat, my love, before we start crying again. You are terribly gaunt and weak and I won’t allow that.”

She sighs, accepts the spoonful, but shakes her head. Despite the taste being so nice, she doesn’t let it distract her.

“Solas, you need to eat too. You didn’t take care of yourself either.”

“Hush. You first.” He presses the spoon, full again, against her mouth and smiles with his eyebrows raised. “It won’t enter from your nose, _vhenan_.”

She snorts and opens her mouth, letting the warm, rich liquid invade it. She recognizes the sweet taste of squash, but also elfroot and spindleweed, the same herbs Enasalin put in the dishes he prepared for her.

She feels a pang of guilt and regret, but she knows Solas would get worried if he saw her being sad again. Furthermore, she knows he is hurting for the agent too and she doesn’t want to make this moment heavy and bitter.

It’s special, beautiful, and Enasalin fought hard to make it happen. Seeing them be sad instead of finally happy and celebrating is the last thing he would want to see.

However, they owe him much and she cannot wait until tomorrow to thank him. She has to do it today, before the day ends, before the blood on his corpse completely dries and his skin becomes white.

Solas looks completely relaxed, finally content, so she decides to wait until she has finished eating before asking him to see Enasalin’s body.

It’s like they never stayed apart in the first place, like there has been no two years gap between them. The gifts they exchanged surely helped, but there is no awkwardness, no hesitation in the way they interact with each other: they joke, play, kiss, smile and laugh with each other just like they always did during the time of the Inquisition.

Much has changed around them, but they stayed the same and Scarlet’s hope is like a flame, burning high and strong in her, unquenchable like the one mentioned in that verse of the Chant of Light that stuck in her mind.

“Good.” Solas smiles, nodding, once the bowl is empty. He tears the bread for her, but she convinces him to eat half of it with her. It takes some minutes, but in the end he relents and they eat it together.

He brings the light brown, crispy pieces to her mouth, grinning when she playfully nips at his fingertips, then eats his own, always staring at her.

They talk about nice, small things. They start with the gifts they sent each other and the ones Solas wasn’t able to deliver after hiding again out of fear. He shows them to her, carefully placed inside a chest, but they agree to see them the next day, since it’s already dark outside.

Then the topic moves to Scarlet’s new base and the view she could see from her windows.

“How are the others?” Solas suddenly asks and her eyes get even bigger. She wasn’t expecting that question and she has done her best to avoid mentioning their respective organizations and their old companions, not wanting to appear too insisting or insensitive.

There is time and Solas doesn’t need to be pestered with pleas and stubborn requests to listen to what they discovered. He needs respite, love, and comfort and Scarlet is here to provide them all.

But he looks interested and curious and that fuels the hope in her heart, so she answers with a bright smile: “They are fine. Everyone is busy with their own business, but we always find time to write to each other.” She gets flustered and plays with the bread crumbs left on the tray.

“They miss you and hope you are well too.” she adds and Solas’ smile is small, but sincerely touched and even a bit surprised.

He doesn’t say anything else about it, but the smile lingers on his lips as he takes the pastry and moves it near her mouth.

She shakes her head and makes him put it back on the tray before tearing it in half, just like they did with the bread.

“ _Vhenan_.” he sighs fondly, but she presses herself against him again and giggles, her lips on his cheek, and he can’t refuse.

With another sigh that doesn’t sound resigned or annoyed at all, he accepts his half of the pastry and rests his hand on the small of her back, helping her eat and watching her with that intense, tender gaze that makes her blush like when they still weren’t together and just flirted smoothly - and awkwardly - with each other.

“You are like an old married couple.” Dorian commented with an amused smirk after their first anniversary.

_Dorian!_

“Solas! Solas, the crystal!” she exclaims, making him jump out of his skin. She frantically looks around, looking for her locket, for the only way she has to reassure Dorian and the others.

She is sure her absence from her base has been noticed by now. Leliana is most likely searching for her and Scarlet has no doubts in mind that she contacted and warned their old companions.

Her expert agents will find the traces she and Enasalin left while pursued by the Venatori. They will discover the elven ruins where Enasalin was killed, they will see the blood and think of the worst.

All her friends and soldiers will fall into despair or, worse, directly face the most dangerous leaders of the Venatori to find her.

There will be chaos and many lives will be lost. She can’t stay here, wounded but safe and lovingly pampered by the love of her life, while her friends and loyal agents believe she is dead or subjected to terrible torture.

“Solas, I had a locket, a special crystal, around my neck. I use it to communicate with Dorian and…”

“I know.” He is smiling again, a soft, somewhat melancholic expression. He gently frees her and himself from their mutual embrace and gets up, moving to his desk. There, he retrieves her locket from behind a huge book and another pile of papers.

He brings it to her and she delicately takes it, letting out a relieved sigh when she sees it didn’t break during the assault of the Venatori. It still shimmers and hums cheerfully and she raises her golden eyes to look at Solas, a plea in them.

“May I call him?” she asks as he sits next to her again. “They probably know I left the base and if they already found those ruins and the blood…” She sighs, shaking her head, then babbles: “Leliana is in constant communication with him and the others, they might…!”

“Of course.” Solas gently interrupts her. He nods at the crystal and his sad smile fades away, until only that quiet sorrow remains in his eyes. “What will you tell him?”

Is this what he is worried about? He fears that she will lie because she is ashamed of being with him and doesn’t want anyone to know she is in his base? Or does he fear what _she_ thinks about her condition, her status here?

“Solas.” she calls, her voice a dumbfounded whisper. She leaves the locket on the bed to cup his cheek and he immediately leans into her palm, watching her with those sad, tearful eyes.

“Solas, my heart.” She kisses him and he breathes out a long, shaky sigh that ghosts over her mouth. “I will tell him the truth. That you and Enasalin saved me.” She smiles and dries his eye with her thumb. “And that I am so, so happy to finally be here with you.”

He makes a happy sound and two pink dots tint his cheeks, spreading the color up to his ears, but he looks down at the locket with twitching lips and worried blue-gray eyes.

“They won’t understand.” he says. “They will tell you to leave.”

Scarlet blinks. Then laughter bubbles in her chest, reaches her throat, and leaves it accompanied by an embarrassing snort which quickly turns into a fit of giggles.

“Oh, Solas!” She throws her arm around his neck, ignoring the pain and eliciting a breathless grunt from him. She kisses his face until he finally - _finally_ \- relaxes again and accepts to be pampered just like he pampered her.

He craves affection and touch - _her_ affection and touch: that much is clear from the way he smiles and takes all the kisses she gives him without a moment of hesitation. He snorts and bites his lips as she tickles him with her lips and his hands dig into her nightgown, even lifting it up.

He refuses to be separated from her and she is glad for it, because she wouldn’t let him go, not even if a Titan stepped into the room or if the Maker Himself told her to do it.

“You silly wolf.” she laughs, more breathless than ever. She kisses the tip of his nose and Solas, face flushed red, stares at her, dumbstruck and chest heaving.

“They rooted for us all this time.” she explains, her grin leaving room to more giggles. “Dorian was so angry when you didn’t come into my dreams anymore! Leliana even suggested me the right attire for our first meeting after so much time. Blackwall wrote you countless letters, but doesn’t know where to send them.”

She gasps, unable to believe she forgot about the most important thing and that he never found it out.

“Varric! Varric wrote a book about us!” Her smile softens and her calloused fingertips trace the freckles on Solas’ face. He looks more stunned than ever. “It ends well. It’s called _The Wolf’s Bride_.”

A moment of silence, then all that Solas is capable to say is a murmured, disbelieving, tiny:

“ _Fenedhis_.”

And something lively and young, that part of Scarlet that she never got rid of, but momentarily let emerge less to focus all her energies on finding and saving Solas, erupts and rushes through her like a flow of colored water, tinting and painting her soul with those same vivid colours she had as Inquisitor and illuminating everyone and everything that surrounds her in return.

“No, silly.” she giggles, kissing Solas’ nose again. “ _The Wolf’s Bride_. _Fenedhis_ is what you have between your legs.”

Solas’ eyes widen almost comically, then he splutters and laughs with her; he even throws his head back and shuts his eyes, his arms tightening around her as they laugh and laugh, filling the room with the sound of their giggles and howls.

It was a simple joke, but it has broken every wall Solas erected around himself during the past months. He is back to his normal, usual self, the elven apostate who chuckle-snorted, who always had hot chocolate smeared above his upper lip, who got mad at long-dead scholars for writing stupid things about the Fade and directly grumbled at their books, while touching her hair and kissing her cheek in bed.

Scarlet presses her lips on every inch of his face until he laughs with his pressed on hers, tears of mirth streaming down their cheeks. And they feel they are finally complete and whole again.

It takes them a while to regain their breath, but once they do it, their smiles don’t go away and Solas soothes the pain on her arm with dimples on his face while Scarlet seizes the chance to kiss the top of his head too.

“Better?” he asks and after she has nodded and kissed him again, he adds lovingly: “Then call our Tevinter friend. He and the others must be quite worried.”

But Dorian doesn’t answer and images of the brave human attacking every Venatori suspect he can think of fill Scarlet’s mind. She can see him kicking down doors and destroying walls in the attempt to find and save her, but despite his incredible talent as a mage, it’s dangerous and risky and her anxiety returns.

Solas tries to comfort her, a hand rubbing her back and his mouth on her hair.

“Maybe he is sleeping.” he says. “Leliana’s message might not have reached him yet.”

“Let’s hope so.” she sighs, closing the locket and placing it on the tray. Her eyes fall on the pasty they still haven’t finished eating, so, to avoid ruining the mood and letting that bittersweet melancholy enter Solas’ eyes again, she offers it to him with a new, bright smile.

After the last bite, he asks her if she would like to go for a walk before going to sleep.

“This place is old and many rooms cannot be used yet. Most of the mosaics have fallen and many frescoes have almost faded away. ” he says, sounding almost nervous, ashamed. He is even fidgeting and avoiding her eyes, looking at their hands on the bed.

Then he abruptly raises his head and exclaims, sounding enthusiastic:

“But the view is beautiful! There is a nice terrace from where the fields and hills are visible. And the sky is…”

“Solas.” She takes his hand and squeezes it, rubbing her thumb on his chapped knuckles. She smiles. “ _Ma vhenan_. I’d love to.”

“Oh!” He clears his throat and returns the smile. “Wonderful, then. Let me…”

“But before visiting the base, could we please go see Enasalin?” His hand is still sticky after the pastry he cut and brought to her mouth, but she doesn’t mind at all. “I want… I want to thank him now.”

Solas nods with an understanding smile and helps her get up. He babbles something about go taking new clothes for her somewhere in the base, but she stops him and says that the wolf fur on the bed will be more than enough to cover and shield her from the chilly evening air.

“The nightgown is _light_.” he retorts, frowning, but she takes the fur and drapes it over herself, letting it flow behind her like a mantle. She sticks out her tongue at him.

“See?” she laughs. “It’s perfect!” She looks down at her chest and punctually blushes. “Uh… I… I just need something to close it here.”

Solas chuckles and uses a pin taken from his desk to secure the front of the fur mantle in place, so nobody will catch a glimpse of her candid nightgown underneath it. Scarlet thanks him with a kiss on his chin that momentarily confuses him, until she reminds him he is the one who needs to get dressed now.

She helps him put his armor back on and, after ensuring the fur is adequately covering her, Solas takes her hand, kisses it, and opens the door.

Two armored agents fall on the floor at their feet. They scramble to get up again, but they face Solas’ glare with admirable courage, straightening their backs and clearing their throats as if nothing unusual happened.

“Good evening, sir.” they say in unison. Their eyes move to Scarlet and they stare at her for a millisecond, before focusing back on Solas.

“Good evening, my lady.” they add and she slightly bows her head, replying: “Good evening.”

They are probably city elves, since they have no _vallaslin_ on their faces, which are also much different from the ones of the elven Sentinels of the Temple of Mythal. Enasalin told her Abelas and his men were here and she knows how to recognize them.

These young men betray easily their emotions and there is a sort of look and vibe to them that leads her to think they are still not used to all this.

“Mh.” Solas’ mouth moves funnily as he hums. It looks like a smile, but one might also think he is grimacing. “Is everything alright?” He raises an eyebrow. “Heard or saw anything interesting while guarding the door?”

“Nothing, sir.” the blond agent quickly responds. His companion, slightly shorter than him and dark-haired, adds: “Absolutely nothing. Everything is alright.”

That smile-grimace again, then Solas nods and motions them to move so that he and Scarlet can go out. The agents immediately move from their way and Solas closes the door before addressing them again:

“We shall come back soon. If anyone ask for us, tell them we are in the little courtyard.”

“Of course, sir.” the blond elf says, but the dark-haired one frowns.

“The little courtyard, sir?” he repeats and Solas blinks, taken aback.

“Exactly. Is something bothering you, son?” This time he smiles for real and his tone is kind as he continues: “If that is so, please speak up.”

“Well…” the elf with black hair tilts his head, while his friend stares at him as if he has gone mad. “It’s just that there is a corpse there and my Pa always said you don’t bring a girl to a place where corpses, piss, or Chantry people are. It’s not romantic.” He looks at his friend, who looks like he wants to run or impale himself on his spear. “Right, _lethallin_?”

Scarlet giggles. Solas blinks twice, very slowly. The blond elf babbles something unintelligible while his companion patiently waits.

Then Solas’ solemn face falls and he smiles again, a sheepish little thing that shocks even the laid-back dark-haired elf.

“That is true.” he admits. “Your father was a wise man.”

Then Scarlet intervenes and as soon as she speaks, the two agents straighten up again, stiff like statues.

“I asked Solas to go there. I want to pay homage to Enasalin before tomorrow.”

Hearing the name of their friends makes the agents look down in sorrow, but they instantly look back at Scarlet as she softly continues: “I want to thank him before the day ends. But…” She turns to Solas and smiles, entwining her fingers with his and saying: “I am sure Solas will show me that beautiful terrace he mentioned, later. Right, _vhenan_?”

His smile is so sweet the agents nearly step back in shock.

“Of course, _vhenan_.”

His gaze changes when he turns back to the other elves, but there is still a certain softness in his eyes that makes them stare at him without shame.

“Well, then. We will see you later.”

The agents bow their heads and watch them walk away until they are far from their sight. Then the blond elf hits his companion’s leg with his spear, earning himself a punch on the arm and some muttered curses.

 

\- - - -

 

Scarlet and Solas pass through a garden in a large courtyard and she notices the glowing eyes of many other elves, hidden in the shadows or standing between the archways of the second floor of the base.

She recognizes the golden glinting of the Sentinels’ armor, sees different shades and types of _vallaslin_ , catches glimpses of curious stare and scarred hands near columns and open doors.

Whispers reach her ears, but they are too low to be audible. They don’t sound menacing or aggressive, though, and she believes some of those agents even smile at her from afar.

Solas holds tightly her hand and leads her through the large courtyard, then through a small passage between two different buildings, then finally into another garden.

The architecture is elven and she sees old mosaics on the walls whose golden tiles have fallen or turned brown. Broken statues lie on the ground and many frescoes are still difficult to see, their colors faded away or completely modified by the effects of time and weather.

But there is also beauty in the countless flowers growing among the rich grass; the broken statues - all representing Fen’Harel - are still gilded and colorful plants grow near them too.

There are lanterns hanging from the archways which provide warm light and entertainment to the small moths. Playful fireflies complete the mosaics, filling the missing parts with their delicate golden flight, and the frescoes can still tell their story with grace and elegance under the light of the moon and the one cast by the lanterns.

It feels like home.

“Do you like it?” Solas asks, his voice a sweet whisper near her ear. “We… we haven’t had much time to fix everything yet.”

“It’s beautiful!” Scarlet whispers in awe, then she turns to him and smiles. “It’s so much beautiful, Solas.”

He grins, happy, kisses her hand and then they enter the smaller courtyard. There is a tall, florid tree at the center of it and no lanterns have been lit: the only source of light comes from the moon, whose rays illuminate the white cloth laying under the tree, surrounded by flowers and burning incense pots.

They are gifts for Enasalin brought by his friends and Scarlet kneels near his corpse, soon followed by Solas. She slowly removes the white cloth from the agent’s face and gasps.

The blood has been washed away, but it’s still visible in some points. There are cuts and wounds on his face and neck, joining the old scar on his cheek, and he looks so, so much older. His olive skin is already changing color, but slower than she expected, probably thanks to a spell cast by Solas.

His expression isn’t pained, but nearly serene. It almost looks like there is a smile on his chapped lips and tears fill Scarlet’s eyes as she passes her hand over his brow. He is cold, but that faint smile is warm and she hopes he found peace in whatever lies after death.

Next to her, Solas is quiet, his gaze as sad as hers as he observes the dead body of his agent.

She glances down at the flowers people brought for Enasalin, then spots the others growing wildly near the tree. She gets up and picks some, then returns to Solas’ side and shows them to him.

“Help me, please?” she asks and he looks first at the flowers, then at her and his own smile - that sweet, kind smile she loves so much - blooms on his face as he nods.

Together, they make a flower crown: Solas entwines the stems of the flowers together while she chooses the combination of colors and helps him with the measurements.

They work in silence, sometimes interrupted only by their soft tones as they decide together how to proceed.

After not many minutes, the flower crown is ready and they delicately rests it upon Enasalin’s head, its colorfulness joining the dark hues of his brown hair.

“Thank you, Enasalin.” Scarlet murmurs, pressing a gentle kiss on his forehead. Solas waits for her to be back at his side, then leans over and kisses the agent’s brow as well, whispering: “ _Ma serannas, lethallin_.”

Now that she knows who the Creators really were, she can’t use the prayers her clan taught her and she wonders how the funeral will be held tomorrow. However, even though she doesn’t have any sacred words to use, she can still use the ones coming from her heart, sure Enasalin would have appreciated them even more.

“Walk in the light, friend. Run free in the golden fields of the Beyond.” she says as she and Solas pull the white cloth back on his face. “Run victorious.”

And under the moonlight, the flowers around Enasalin’s head look like a sculpture, a gilded crown to mark his success.


	2. A Funeral For The Lost

The smell of food wakes her up again, but this time is not Solas who is carrying the tray.

They slept together again, safe and warm under the furs of his bed. He checked her wound one last time before helping her get comfortable and guiding her in the Fade, where they made love and spent time with each other after what had felt like an eternity.

It was the best night they had in years and it was like being back at Skyhold, surrounded by familiarity and domesticity.

Scarlet vaguely remembers Solas getting up, kissing her forehead, and check her wound a second time, but then she fell asleep again.

The elf who entered the room is a woman, older than Scarlet, her bub haircut highlighting the angular features of her face. She wears no vallaslin and Scarlet can see a certain light in her dark eyes that suggests she is not a Dalish, but a city elf.

The woman’s lips curl into a bright, perhaps a bit intimidated smile, and she says cheerfully: “Good morning, my lady! Lord Fen’Harel sent me to bring you food.”

She looks embarrassed for a moment before adding: “He also apologizes for not eating with you. He needs to prepare everything for Enasalin’s funeral.”

Scarlet can’t say she isn’t sad of having breakfast without him - after eating together last night, she can’t but hope for more, for things to get just like they were before. Still, she knows he is pretty busy, not just with the most urgent stuff that needs to be dealt with now, but in general.

He is Fen’Harel and even though he doesn’t like to give orders and command others, he feels like he has to, that this is his duty. Do his agents think she may be a distraction? Are they angry with her, annoyed, looking forward to her departure?

She didn’t sense such a thing the night before, as they walked through the base, watched by them from the shadows. But she knows some of them must be quite adamant in seeing the Veil fall down and she has no doubt that Abelas’ Sentinels think she has to go away immediately.

The woman currently placing the tray on the bed looks quite friendly, though. She is wearing what looks like scout clothes and her movements are quick, precise, the one of a practical expert used to do things efficiently.

For a moment, Scarlet misses her left arm terribly. She used to be that quick once. She was- _is_ a rogue, but she lost part of her agility, even despite the mechanical arm replacing her natural one.

Solas called her _graceful_ the first time they flirted, at Haven. Does he still think that?

 _‘Of course he does!’_ she tells herself, breathing deeply to calm down and avoid crying in front of the agent. _‘Stop being a fool. You are here now, with him. Everything is going to be alright.’_

“Thank you.” she tells the agent with a smile, then looks at the tray and chuckles. “It looks quite good.”

“Lord Fen’Harel told the cook to prepare something healthy and hot. A strong wind is blowing today.”

The woman walks over to the pile of gifts Solas wanted to send Scarlet and picks up a particularly beautiful leather bag, decorated with many colorful beads and elven motifs, and takes it to the bed, opening to let Scarlet see its contents.

Inside there are beautiful elven clothes, their colors warm, reminiscent of the green and golden tones of the woods at the beginning of autumn.

The fabric feels familiar to the one of the ancient robes she once found in elven ruins and which Solas wore until something sturdier was crafted for him. These have probably been made with lyrium too and she passes her fingertips over the sewed threads, admiring their quality.

“Solas had this made for me?” she says softly. She gasps when she notices the two little wolves embroidered on the top left of the shirt, right above the heart.

“Yes, my lady. I believe he crafted them himself somehow.” The agent fidgets next to the bed, tightening her lips, and Scarlet, sensing her hesitation, raises her head to see what’s wrong.

“Do you need help to eat or dress yourself, my lady? Lord Fen’Harel said…”

Scarlet smiles and shakes her head.

“I think I can manage alone, thank you. I need to get used to move without my arm more. I can’t always rely on the mechanical one or someone else.”

“Of course, my lady.” The agent bows her head, but her eyes linger on the gauzes visible under Scarlet’s nightgown.

“Is the wound alright? I mean, if it starts bleeding while you…”

“Solas checked it before leaving the room.” she replies, her smile broadening and a blush coloring her face with pink tones.

The agent takes a deep breath and her face betrays something. It’s… excitement? _Pride_?

“I knew it!” she whispers, before clearing her throat and saying quickly, her words nearly unintelligible: “My lady, forgive my rudeness, but I’d like to ask you a favor!”

Scarlet, the brim of a glass full of milk near her lips, stares at her, taken aback.

“Y-Yes?”

The agent rummages into the deep pockets of her coat and takes out one… _three_ small books which Scarlet recognizes immediately.

“That’s Varric’s book! _All This Shit Is Weird_!” she exclaims, knowing too well how the dwarf narrated the events of the Inquisition in that novel. She doesn’t remember slaying three dragons all at once thanks to her magic daggers and the power of love flowing through her after Solas had been badly hurt.

But the agent looks even more excited than before and can barely stay still as she hands her the books.

“Could you sign them? I know you are not the author, but you are the _main character_! How often does that happen?” She blushes and gets all flustered, while pointing at the cover of the first one. “This one is mine! My name is Melana, by the way.”

“A pleasure.” Scarlet smiles at her and spends the next few minutes writing down on the first page of the books.

She really doesn’t know what to say, but her name and simple kind words are enough to make Melana gasp and bounce on her feet.

“Oh, thank you! Adahl and Alas will be _so_ happy!”

“Who are they?” Scarlet asks, distractedly thinking that her right arm doesn’t hurt anymore even when she lifts it up to eat. Whatever Solas did to it, it worked and she can feel her strengths coming back.

A cold shiver of anxiety runs down her back and she focuses back on Melana and the food on the tray.

“They are the agents outside this room. I think you met them yesterday night.”

“Oh, the dark-haired man and his blond friend?”

“Yes.” Melana nods with a grin, pushing the books back into her coat. She doesn’t hide them well this time and the bulge is quite well visible, the shape under the leather unmistakable. “They asked me to ask _you_ a lot of questions, but…”

She glances at the windows and concludes softly: “I think it’s almost time.”

A cold pang of pain strikes Scarlet’s heart. She remembers Enasalin’s dead body, the flower crown she and Solas made for him, the serene mood of the courtyard he was laying in.

But then she remembers Solas showing her the sight from the ruins, his kisses as he helped her get in bed, his happy tears as they finally hugged each other after so much time spent apart from each other, his smile and laughter as they talked and fell asleep together.

So she nods at the agent and swallows the last bite of apple pie before getting up and starting taking the clothes to dress herself.

“So… if you don’t need any help, my lady…” Melana moves to take the tray, while Scarlet grimaces and looks down at the shoulder.

The wound doesn’t hurt if she just moves her arm, but she can feel it itch and tug at her skin if she makes too wide movements. She knows it’s best if she accepts the other elf’s help, but…

She doesn’t want to get _better_. Getting better means leaving this place soon. It means feeling too well to convince Abelas and the agents who don’t want her here that she needs to stay.

So she stays quiet and tightens her lips, biting the inside of them, as she removes the nightgown and puts on the clothes Solas made for her. They feel even more precious as they fall on her skin like satin, light as air, but sturdy as silverite.

She feels the wound open and blood wet the gauzes, but hopes nobody will notice it until the funeral is over.

Melana is waiting near the door with the tray in her hands, probably ready to throw it away, but that sounds like a terrible waste of food, even though Scarlet ate all the apple pie and drank all the milk.

Maybe someone else will eat it…? They do that in her organization, since they don’t have many resources and much money to spend, not even on food.

The blonde elf is politely avoiding to look at her, but she immediately raises her head when Scarlet timidly calls her.

“Are you…. Are you taking that back to the kitchens?”

Melana looks down at the tray, then shakes her head.

“No, my lady. The cooks will prepare you something fresher to eat after the funeral if you are still hungry.”

“But that’s not right!” Scarlet exclaims, frowning. Melana looks terribly shocked, even _saddened_.

“Is… is it not?” she babbles and Scarlet sighs, gesturing at the desk.

“Please leave it there. That food will still be delicious for lunch. There is no need to throw it away and prepare me something new every time.”

Now the other elf looks terrified.

“But Lord Fen’Harel said…!”

“What?” Scarlet raises an eyebrow. “To treat me like royalty? I don’t want that. I just want to be treated like everyone else here.”

“I…” Melana thinks about it, clearly not convinced, but then nods and places the tray on the desk, making sure not to look at the notes and books scattered on it.

“Good! Thank you.” Scarlet smiles, but it doesn’t last long. She glances at the door and lets out a heavy sigh. “I guess it’s time. Will you accompany me?”

“Of course, my lady.” Melana helps her put on a fur cape, mentioning the cold wind again, then, after making sure everything is alright, she opens the door.

The two elves from the night before scrambles back at the sides of it, pretending not to have eavesdropped on them.

Melana’s face changes in an instant and she seizes them both with a heated, furious glare.

“You two!” she hisses, kicking the dark-haired elf’s shin. “What in the Void is your problem?”

“Good morning, lady Lavellan.” The two elves ignore their colleague, focusing on Scarlet, who smiles patiently and greets them back.

She learns that Adahl is the dark-haired elf, the one who really doesn’t seem upset by anything. His more nervous, antsy, blond friend is Alas, who doesn’t even dare look at her.

They walk behind her and Melana, accompanying them along the archways that surround the courtyard. Sometimes Adahl whispers something, but Alas or Melana quickly hushes him with another glare. Scarlet pretends not to see.

Solas’ base looks even older during the day. She can see the crumbled walls, the fading mosaics, but the gilded decorations on the walls and floor must be enchanted, because there isn’t a single speck of rust on them.

This time, there are no other agents watching her from behind the doors or the shadows. The whole place is eerily quiet and only the noise of their steps on the cracked tiles and the chirping of birds in the distance break the silence.

Suddenly, Adahl asks Melana to join him with an excuse and she begrudgingly slows down, while Scarlet and Alas walk ahead.

They start to whisper heatedly and again Scarlet pretends to be too interested in her surroundings to listen to them.

Adahl isn’t exactly discreet, though, so she nearly stumbles on her feet when she hears him say:

“Do you think they made love again?”

“The Lady said Lord Fen’Harel took care of her wound yesterday!” Melana replies, her voice a hiss. “I told you he would do that!”

“Of course he would!”

Melana continues: “It’s like Tethras wrote, they are so domestic and sweet! You should see the Lady’s face when she talks about the Wolf!”

“We saw them yesterday.” Adahl reminds her. “Walking arm in arm like a newly married couple.”

He pauses, then asks with trepidation: “Did you ask her if those stories are true…?”

“I wanted to, but there was no time.” Melana rummages into her jacket and takes out the two books. “Here, she signed them! Give it to Alas later.”

The other elf hurries to take the volumes and hide them under his armor, all while trying to stifle his excited comments and giggles.

“I wonder if it’s true that the Wolf laughed so much at her jokes that he cried tears of mirth.”

“Tethras wrote that he and the Inquisitor would spend their evenings in the rotunda, the Lady sitting on his lap, sewing, while he read to her.”

A gasp. “Can you imagine the Wolf _cuddling_?”

“I can’t even imagine him smile, but…”

“He smiled _a lot_ yesterday!” Adahl sighs, then adds solemnly: “I am sure that they also made love.”

Scarlet lets out a strangled sound and the two agents panic, while poor Alas at her side grips his spear so strongly his knuckles turn pale.

Melana hurriedly goes back to her and there is an anxious apology on her reddened face.

“Forgive us, Lady Lavellan! We’ve been impolite and…”

“It’s just that we heard so much about you and Lord Fen’Harel.” Adahl says, as calm as ever. “Everyone here wants to know more.”

“Is it true that he used to hum under his breath while painting?” Alas says, wide-eyed, his blond hair too long and falling near his eyes. “A friend who infiltrated the Inquisition said he did.”

“It’s true.” Scarlet confirms with a shy smile, remembering the lovely hours she spent in the rotunda, listening to Solas’ voice. She blushes and looks ahead, at the path leading outside the base they have taken. “I always sat on his lap while we read.”

“I _knew_ it!” Melana gasps, while the two other agents look happier than ever, as if they heard the best news in the world.

The three of them actually remind Scarlet of Cassandra, of the way she always squeal and grin when something good happens in one of her books.

“Varric exaggerated some things, but the majority of what he wrote in that novel is true.” she continues, causing the agents to look at each other with sparkling eyes and big, toothy smiles. She can’t help but smile as well, eager to show how kind and loving Solas is.

“Solas always read to me at night and taught me how to write and read Elvhen.” Her expression turns nostalgic and tender as she recalls those days. “And he would often rest his head on my lap while I read to him.”

The three agents listen rapturously as she keeps listing all the things she and Solas used to do together, the ones that aren’t too private and personal to be shared.

Their reactions are varied: sometimes they believe her and even find the passages in Varric’s novel that describe what she is saying; other times, they can’t believe the Wolf really did that and politely ask for more information.

When she tells them that Varric just published a new shorter novel based on her and Solas, _The Wolf’s Bride_ , where even more reliable stuff can be read, they can’t believe their ears and immediately start planning to retrieve a copy as soon as possible.

They remind her of Enasalin now, of the short trip they took together to reach Solas in those elven ruins.

The pain of his death still hurts her greatly, but she remembers with a great warmth in her heart how he genuinely wanted to know more about the man he had decided to follow, how much he believed in him and her too.

These three agents are much different from him, but they share his same enthusiasm and hope.

They root for her and Solas just like he did and they don’t seem particularly eager to see the Veil fall in a destructive, catastrophic way.

She learns that Adahl, with his dark hair, pale skin, and blunt manners, actually grew up with a human, the ‘Pa’ he mentioned the night before, a honest man who found him abandoned in a forest and decided to take care of him.

“He passed away the day the Temple of Sacred Ashes exploded. He was there to bring food supply for the guests.” he says and Scarlet doesn’t ask - not yet - why he decided to enter Solas’ army and see the Veil fall, despite the great sweetness with which he talks about his father.

Alas remains a mystery, but the quiet, dark-skinned elf shares some minor information about himself, revealing that he was born Dalish, but was captured by slavers from Tevinter when he was still young.

“The agents of the Wolf freed me.” he adds and Scarlet realizes that he hast just accidentally told her that Solas’ web of spies has reached the Tevinter Imperium too.

She doesn’t comment on that, but she stores that piece of information into her mind all the same, not because she wants to use it against Solas, but because it could prove essential to convince him to change his plan.

Melana comes from the alienage of Ansburg in the Free Marches and her views on humans aren’t as nice and kind as Adahl’s, but her words aren’t laced with poison when she mentions them.

She talks about ‘finally making a difference’, but her dark eyes badly hide sympathy as she looks up at the clear sky above them.

Just as silence falls between them, Scarlet realizes two things: first, they have left the base and are now walking on a narrow path in a rich, thriving forest.

She can see an unfamiliar landscape in the distance between the tree, a large field covered with wheat, but has no idea where she is. She probably isn’t in Ferelden or Orlais. Maybe the Free Marches or Nevarra?

The second thing she realizes is that she left her crystal in Solas’ room. She won’t be able to respond to Dorian, should he call now.

A blush tints her cheeks. It took Solas some time to start calling her quarters at Skyhold _his_ rooms too. Then they became _their_ quarters and now she finds herself to be in the same position: can she call that room hers as well?

How long will she be able to stay here anyway? Can she do something to extend her time here somehow? Or will Solas ask her to show him what she and the others have discovered and then send her away even though he doesn’t want to?

She sighs heavily and glances down at her right shoulder for a second. It still burns and she knows it’s slowly, but surely, bleeding. The sleeve is still clean, but it’s only a matter of time until the blood seeps completely through the gauzes and tints the golden fabric.

She adjusts the fur cape on her back, distractedly thinking about her left mechanical arm and where it might be. She didn’t see it in Solas’ - _their_ \- room. Perhaps someone is repairing it?

She snaps out of her reverie when they enter a large clearing. She finally sees it now, Solas’ army, or at least a big part of it.

Some heavy armored agents stand near the tallest trees, while rogues and scouts linger in the shadows offered by the branches and foliage. All wear the characteristic golden and brown armors she saw Solas and Abelas wear too, simpler versions of them, of course, with differences based on the various tasks and classes.

Speaking of Abelas and his Sentinels, she spots them far from the rest, almost hiding just like their hood-covered faces. They don’t mingle with the other agents and observe the center of the clearing where Enasalin’s body lies with calm, cold, collected stares.

Solas is also at the center of the clearing, standing right next to the body. A hole has been dug in the ground and a lovely, small sprout waits to be planted into the soil.

Everyone turns to where Scarlet is once she and her entourage steps into the glade. She sees kind looks, curious stares, and excited smiles just like yesterday night, but also disapproving glares and confused whispers that only sunlight allows to see and hear.

Abelas and his men seem to ooze pure bitterness and distaste. Not all of them, fortunately; some of the Sentinels look as curious as Solas’ agents, but the majority of them clearly doesn’t want her to be here, just like she expected.

She hopes she isn’t causing Solas any trouble. That’s the last thing she wants and even though she knows he can deal with the Sentinels, maybe his own spies will be more difficult to convince and appease.

All those fears melt away as soon as his eyes fall on her.

“ _Ma vhenan_!” he exclaims with a smile, quickly walking to her, reaching for her. She immediately takes his hand and smiles in return, already feeling better.

“Good morning, _vhenan_.” she says softly, then gasps surprised as he leans down and kisses her in front of everyone.

He never refrained from kissing her in public during the time of the Inquisition, but she feels flattered all the same that he does it even now, with his army watching them.

Said army begins to whisper and talk in low tones and Scarlet blushes again, but her smile is blinding and so large her cheeks ache.

“Sleep well?” Solas murmurs smugly with the same tone he used after they shared their first kiss in the Fade and she can’t stop the giggle building in her throat from escaping her lips.

“You know I did.” she says, looking up at him with a loving gaze that makes a blush appear on his gaunt face.

“Good. Come now, my heart.” He kisses her hand, then leads her to Enasalin’s body, arm in arm.

An elderly agent approaches and removes the white cloth covering the man’s body. Enasalin is still wearing the flower crown Solas and Scarlet made for him and the old agent fixes it better on his head before nodding at two other elves.

The three agents slowly lowers Enasalin into the hole in the ground while the rest of the army silently moves near and watches quietly.

A sad hum, a low song which Scarlet doesn’t recognize, begins to echo in the woods until it turns into a melancholic chorus. The words are in ancient Elvhen and she doesn’t understand much, but it sounds somewhat similar to _In Uthenera_ , the eulogy most Dalish clans sing to celebrate one’s death.

One of the three agents who lowered Enasalin’s body into the hole is a mage and she uses her powers to move the earth around him to cover him completely.

She does it without hurry, almost following the rhythm of the song, and Scarlet watches with a heavy heart as the dead agent slowly disappears from her sight.

Solas, standing next to her, puts his hand on hers, which is resting on his arm, and leans his head until it’s touching hers, a sweet gesture to bring her comfort and warmth.

She feels tears prickling her eyes and before she knows it they are already running down her cheeks.

When she turns to look at Solas, she can see his glossy gaze too and sighs softly, hiding her face against his chest as the dirt falls on Enasalin.

The sorrowful tune reaches its apex as the earth is smoothened until only a slight bump on the ground is visible. Then the old agent takes the plant and moves it right above the point where Enasalin’s head is supposed to be.

It doesn’t take much time - the old elf is clearly an expert, a Dalish who probably took care of the herbs and fruits of his clan - and the agents sing and hum the last lyrics of the funeral song just as he covers the roots of the sprout with the last ounce of dirt.

Then it’s Solas’ turn. The three agents move to give him the space necessary and he raises his free hand, murmurs a few words, and a soothing green shimmer surrounds his fingers and the tiny plant.

He is enchanting it so that it will be protected against the weather and any other possible danger as it grows, Scarlet realizes. She cuddles further into his side and he rests his head on hers again as the light fades away and only a faint shimmer remains above the plant.

The song has ended and the clearing is silent, except for the sound of the wind among the leaves and the birds, and Scarlet sniffles, feeling like another important door has closed for another to be opened.

“ _Ma serannas_ , Enasalin.” she whispers and the sound of her voice echoes in the quiet glade. Many agents bow their heads and she does the same, closing her eyes, not knowing what prayer to pronounce.

She repeats softly the same thing she said the night before and imagines Enasalin smiling as he watches her and Solas finally being together again.

“Let’s go, _ma vhenan_.” Solas murmurs, starting to move. “He is resting in peace now.” He glances down at her shoulder and adds: “Let me take another look at your wound later.”

Scarlet nods without saying anything, raw guilt twisting her guts. She knows Solas will get terribly worried once he sees her wound has reopened. She knows he will panic at the sight of new blood marring her skin.

But if that’s the only way to ensure she can stay with him longer, then she is willing to _maim_ herself and lose her other arm too.

Before they can leave, two agents stop Solas to talk about what sounds like an important matter.

They mention a new part of the base discovered in the proximities, a series of big rooms which could prove quite useful if fixed and renovated. They are visible even from here, damaged walls and foundations hidden in the tall grass.

“Perhaps you should check them out, Lord Fen’Harel. We could use more space.” one of the agents say and he slowly nods, a serious, tired look on his pale face.

“Of course. Lead the way.” He turns to Scarlet and guilt and sadness replace his austere look.

“ _Vhenan_ , you should wait here. You have just recovered and I do not want you to get too tired.”

“Solas, I'm fine.” she says with a smile, but there is already a great concern in his eyes that is only going to get worse once he sees her bloody wound. He will think it’s his fault, that she bumped against a tree or wall to accompany him, and she doesn’t want him to feel bad.

“But you are right.” she adds, happy to see relief fill his eyes. “I _am_ a bit tired. I will wait for you here, _vhenan_.”

“It won’t take too long.” he promises, then he kisses her, smiles brightly, and turns to follow the two agents. He turns to her one last time before entering the woods and she waves at him, trying not to wince when the wound sends a painful sting of pain through her arm.

She starts picking flowers for Enasalin’s tomb and timidly watches the agents go back to the main base, looking down when she sees they are staring at her.

Some of them remain there, standing behind trees or sitting down in the grass, their weapons laying at their side. She doesn’t understand what they are doing at first, then it dawns on her: they are watching over her, probably not wanting to leave her alone in the middle of the woods.

The three kind agents who accompanied her are still here as well, gathering flowers to help her, but doing it a bit far from her, perhaps not wanting to bother her.

She is about to join them when a shadow covers her, looming over her lithe figure.

She looks up and sees Abelas staring down at her with a sour, grim face.

“We need to talk.” he says slowly and a heavy weight, heavy like all the dirt that has been dropped over Enasalin’s body, falls on her heart, crushing it.

She knew this was going to happen, but not _so_ soon, and she feels vulnerable, but strong enough to explain herself and _defend_ her reasons, her wish to stay here with Solas, not because she wants to spy on him, but because she loves him and doesn’t want to stay away from him anymore.

“Very well.” she says kindly, nodding. She spots a large rock and goes sit on it, gently resting the flowers on her lap. Abelas follows her, but doesn’t sit next to her, preferring to stand, probably to look more convincing and menacing.

“Your presence here brings only chaos.” he starts, eyes narrowed. “Just like at the Temple, just like in the Crossroads. We cannot afford more distraction and death.”

“That is not my intention.” she says softly, looking up from the flowers, but Abelas glares at her.

“Intentionally or not, you are still doing it.” He sighs heavily and asks with a milder tone: “Why are you here? What do you hope to achieve by filling Fen’Harel’s head and heart with ideas and emotions he doesn’t need?”

“He needs them!” she exclaims, staring at him with disbelief. “Abelas, he needs them! How can you even say that?”

“He does not.” The Sentinel closes his hands into tight fists. “We must prepare. Plan. Calculate. We must make sure everything will be ready for the Veil to fall and our world to come back. And what you want to show Fen’Harel - whatever inane ‘solutions’ you and your friends found - won’t work.”

“I’m not here to pester him with what we discovered.” She sighs, shakes her head, and adds: “I mean, I’m here _also_ to show him that, but what I really want is to save Solas.”

Abelas frowns, confused. “Save him? From what?”

“From _himself_.”

Now she is the one glaring and apparently she still has some of her frightening ‘Inquisitor look’ left, because Abelas doesn’t stand as straight as before and he discreetly steps back.

Still, he doesn’t give up and insists, fury slowly building in his voice:

“He does not need to be saved. What you are doing is actually going to ruin him and us all!”

“He needs to know he is still loved!” Scarlet shouts, standing up and facing the Sentinel with fierce fire in her golden eyes. “That he is not a monster, that he doesn’t have to live with guilt and pain forever!”

“We are trying to bring back the world of the elves.” Abelas hisses after recovering from the shock of seeing her so furious. “How can you not want that? Have the People truly lost so much of their former honor?”

“There is honor in wanting to preserve the rest of the world too.” she snaps back, her own hand closing into a fist ready to hit the other elf.

She never liked violence and hitting other people unless necessary, but _right now_ it feels really like that.

“The rest of the world is _wrong_. It was never supposed to exist. It is a mistake the Veil gave birth to.”

Scarlet’s ire slowly melts away, like snow under the sun. She feels a pang of sympathy for Abelas and sighs, looking at him with a softened, mellow look that surprises him greatly. He even blinks, not knowing how to react.

“You say that because you never saw the world as it is now. You never left your Temple and experienced this new Thedas for yourself. You only met fragments of it in the brief moments you didn’t spend sleeping or in your dreams.”

“I saw more than enough.” he growls and Scarlet sees tears in his eyes. “I saw what our empire lost. I saw what the _Elvhen_ lost. You didn’t.”

“I _did_! I did see it when I traveled through the Crossroads - how do you think I felt at the sight of the destroyed Vir Dirthara? At the sight of Solas’ refuge for the freed slaves and all that knowledge lost and forgotten?” She is crying too, but her arm hurts too much and she can’t raise it to dry her eyes.

“But I also saw many dark things and the _absence_ of what we have now. Solas saw it too, he lived in this new world for many years and I know that he _loves_ it.”

“Yes and that’s a terrible mistake!” Abelas retorts, a grimace twisting his features and _vallaslin_. “It’s an alarming sign, the first trace of a weakness we cannot afford!”

“Love is not weakness!” she shouts, pushing him back. “It means he is not one of those monsters that ruled Elvhenan millennia ago! Why do you and your men want him to become like that? Why do _you_ want to be like that?”

“ _How dare you._ ” Abelas’ eyes are full of hatred and rage and he pushes her back, making her stumble against the rock on the ground. “You know _nothing_! You might have seen the ruins of our world, but you never lived in it! You never experienced it!”

“And you never experienced _this_ world!”

“And I have no intention of doing so!” the Sentinel shouts, shoving her onto the rock. Some agents gasp and others silently approach, watching Abelas with wary looks.

“There is nothing here for us.” he continues, his voice hoarse due to the shouting and tears. “And whatever solution you found, it won’t work, it will only cause more havoc.”

He grabs her right arm and Scarlet has to bite back a pained yelp. Abelas’ eyes burn like embers from under his hood and he grits his teeth as he speaks, words laced with sheer despair:

“Leave this place, _shemlen_. Let us restore the Elvhen and get rid of the intruders who tortured the People at every single step.”

He twists her arm as he pronounces the last word and Scarlet screams in pain, startling him and causing all the agents nearby to run to her.

Abelas stumbles back, letting her go, while she falls on the rock, hot blood streaming down her arm, soiling her clothes. He babbles something, then looks at his gauntlet and his eyes widen as he sees it dirty with blood.

Scarlet breathes deeply, remembering all the times she got hurt during the several missions she completed as Inquisitor. She looks down at her shoulder and is about to move her _left_ arm, when she remembers that it’s gone.

It has been an instinctive gesture, but everyone notices it and she blushes, mortification running through her like hot lava, tinting her cheeks with an ashamed red.

She has no ways to check the wound; her right arm hurts too much to be lifted and she isn’t wearing her mechanical left one.

“My lady.” an unfamiliar voice says. She turns and sees a young Sentinel, probably the youngest one she has ever seen, offering his hand.

“Let me…”

“Get back, you!”

Melana intervenes, pushing the Sentinel away with a frightening scowl. The other elf observes her with an unreadable expression, seemingly not bothered by her outburst, but doesn’t stand back, causing Melana to swear and put herself right between him and Scarlet.

“Get back, I said! You and your stupid boss are only going to make things worse!”

“I just want to help.” the Sentinel calmly replies and for a second Cole’s kind smile appears in a flash in Scarlet’s mind.

Her lips trembling, she bows her head, looking at the droplets of blood that fell on the flowers for Enasalin. In front of her, Abelas hesitates and stays quiet, his hand still raised as if he can’t believe he hurt her.

She feels powerless. Drained of all energies, devoid of strength. _Useless_.

She just wants to be in Solas’ arms again.

Next to her, Melana and the Sentinel keep arguing in different ways, their voices echoing in the woods, bothering the birds. The other agents linger near Scarlet, their gazes sympathetic, worried, angry at Abelas, or simply solemn.

And then Solas comes back, followed by the agents that accompanied him to see the ruins of the base.

He immediately notices the commotion and realizes Scarlet is at the center of it. He gasps, panic fills every fiber of his being, and he rushes over to her, pushing people aside.

“ _Ma vhenan_!” he exclaims, holding his breath when she raises her eyes to him and he sees her tears.

Then he sees the blood, the way her stump is slightly tilted towards her right shoulder as if her arm was still there, the blood on Abelas’ gauntlet and his shocked face.

“ _What have you done?_ ” he breathes out, his eyes shimmering with blue, bright light. Abelas pales under the hood and before he can answer, he is sent flying across the glade, his back hitting painfully a tall tree.

“My love.” Solas says softly, his tone kinder than ever, his hands cradling Scarlet’s face. “Come, I need to heal your shoulder.”

“B-But…” She looks at the spoiled flowers and he gently takes them from her lap as she stands. He gives them to the nearest agent, then cradles her face again.

“There will be many more occasions to bring flowers to Enasalin. Now come.”

His tone is getting more panicked by the second, so she lets him take her hand and lead her away, followed by the army of agents and spies, Abelas left alone to count his bruises.

And in their room, shining on the bed, the magic crystal thrums loudly, asking for an answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S FINALLY HERE. I apologize so much for the delay, I've had some health problems ;_; BUT YEAH, THIS FIC IS STILL CONTINUING AND I'M ACTUALLY SUPER HYPED ABOUT IT
> 
> I added some new OCs, but their role won't be extremely important; they are here just to show different point of views and sides of this whole "Veil matter." There will be many familiar faces in the upcoming chapters, smut scenes, and feels ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


	3. Slow Arrow

Solas brings her back to his - _their_ \- room, but she honestly can’t even remember how they arrived there. She is barely aware of his voice whispering panicked, but reassuring words in her ear and she can’t feel a thing.

Except for the sharp pain and the warm blood running down her arm.

She sits, silent and sad, on the bed while Solas babbles and gently moves her clothes so he can get a better look at her shoulder.

He makes a pained sound, a whine, when he sees the reopened wound through the dirty gauzes, but bites his lips and tries to calm down before telling her:

“It will be alright, _ma vhenan_. I will take care of you now. Everything will be alright.”

He removes the bandages while applying water and healing spells to remove the blood and Scarlet flinches, not because the magic water is cold, but because Solas’ hands, still covered by his heavy gauntlets, are.

“Forgive me!” he exclaims and she sees all the worry, guilt, and sadness in his eyes, the pallor on his gaunt face which stress made even narrower.

He takes off the gauntlets and tosses them on the floor, then focuses back on her wound, repeating in a soft, sorrowful voice: “Forgive me, _vhenan_.”

“Why are you always wearing this armor now?” she asks, her own voice shaky and tearful. She doesn’t even know why she is asking this, she just blurted those words out, and all she wants to do is hug Solas and cry.

She would do that if her only arm wasn’t hurting and burning so much, but maybe it’s better this way. She doesn’t want to make Solas worry even more and her tears - seeing her weep - would shock him again.

“My army expects me to wear this.” he replies with a bitter smile and she sniffles, pushing back the urge to cry as much as she can.

“That’s stupid.” she mumbles. “You were so cute and warm with your sweater and torn green pants.”

He chuckles, the sound as bitter as his smile, and Scarlet can’t hold it any longer. Her lip trembles and she starts crying, although quietly.

But Solas notices it, of course, and once he does his expression turns guilty and desperate again. He keeps healing her in agitated silence, not knowing what to do to calm her down: he wants to focus on the wound, but also on her inner turmoil, he wants to kiss her and her face, but also avoid any chance of hurting her arm.

So he does the most logical thing: he removes his armor until he is crouching before her with only his threadbare shirt and pants on and slowly, gently hugs her.

Scarlet cries harder against his shoulder and falls into his arms; she can’t hug him back because her arm hurts too much and she doesn’t have her left one, but she can nuzzle his neck or kiss his cheek and lips as he holds her.

“My love.” he whispers, running his hands along her back. He can feel her spine and sighs, worrying about her lack of appetite and the little food she ate until now.

“My love.” he repeats, lower this time, a soothing whisper in her ear. “Tell me what happened.”

She doesn’t want to tell him. He would only get angrier at Abelas and more worried about her and she doesn’t want that. She didn’t come here to cause him trouble, but to help him and make him feel better.

She doesn’t want him to suffer or get sick with concerns because of her.

So she shakes her head and shakes it again, no matter how much and how Solas insists.

“Did he offend you? Attacked you immediately? What were you arguing about?” He caresses her face, which he’s cradling in his calloused, warm hands, and tries to meet her gaze.

“ _Vhenan_ , please, talk to me. Tell me what happened.”

“We just argued.” she finally says, but doesn’t add anything else and keeps looking at his shirt, at the familiar freckles she can see on his shoulder, at his cleft chin. She sniffles and her lower lip trembles again.

“I’m sorry.” she babbles, before finally looking at him through her tears. “I didn’t want this to happen.”

“Oh, my heart.” He presses his forehead on hers and nuzzles her nose, a sweet, familiar gesture to reassure her. “It is not your fault. You being here is a blessing, one that Abelas and his Sentinels cannot recognize.”

She remembers what Abelas told her, his fear, his certainty that what she and her friends discovered and theorized is only going to make things worse. Did he mean that in general or does he know something she doesn’t?

She doesn’t have the strength nor will to think about that now. She knows, though, that she cannot harm herself anymore: Solas would die of worry and heartbreak if something serious happened to her and she can’t afford to lose her right arm too.

She needs it to hug and caress Solas, after all. She needs it for that and for many other things too, like preparing everything for this desperate effort and being a reliable leader and guide.

And, should everything finally go well, she will need it to walk hand in hand with Solas and their…

“Children.” He says, his expression serious and solemn. “They are children, _vhenan_. Don’t let their age fool you.”

She smiles at that and Solas lets out a relieved sigh and smiles in return. His wasn’t a joke, so he is surprised by her reaction, but extremely pleased to see she is feeling better enough to stop crying.

“Some of them looked quite young.” she says, recalling the Sentinel who approached her to offer his help before being stopped by Melana. “Were they born in the Temple?”

“Yes. However, as ironic as it may sound, the ones born there are those who actually find no problems in having you here.” He narrows his eyes, his rage coming back, all directed at Abelas and those who follow him. “The others who remember Elvhenan, who lived in it, think differently and if they even dare to lay another hand on you…”

“Solas, he didn’t do it on purpose.” she hurries to say, slowly moving her arm to grab the hem of his shirt and pull it gently to make him look at her. He does so and she smiles again, happy to see his ire slowly melting into the same tenderness from before.

“We were arguing and he lost control, but he didn’t do it on purpose. He was as shocked as me, I saw it.”

Solas bumps his nose against her and this gesture, together with his puppy eyes, reminds her so much of the ones of an adorable wolf.

“Tell me what happened.” he repeats, wanting to know the exact words pronounced by Abelas, but Scarlet smiles and shakes her head again. Nothing good will happen if she starts spreading discontentment in Solas’ army and reporting all the bad things said to her.

Also her shyness prevents her from telling him what she said, since they were all things related to him and his happiness. Maybe he would feel embarrassed by what she said to Abelas and she doesn’t want that.

She feels better now, though, and Solas notices that: he brushes back her hair, strokes her cheeks, kisses her lips and decides not to ask anything else related to the incident for the moment.

“Let’s get some rest.” he says instead, rising from his kneeled position in front of her to help her get under the blankets. “You need to sleep.”

He looks around to find her nightgown, but the tray left on his desk catches his attention first. He frowns and goes to it, noting with relief that the apple pie and milk have been finished, although he is confused by its presence all the same.

“Why is this here?” he asks. “I told my agents to bring you fresh food every time you requested it! This shouldn’t…”

“I asked Melana to leave it here. That food is still good and there is no reason to throw it away.” Scarlet gently explains him and he is even more dumbfounded.

“But this is not suitable for lunch or dinner! You need nutritious, warm dishes and this is…”

“Solas.” she calls, smiling fondly at him. “ _Vhenan_ , come back here.”

He does so with a pout, but Scarlet’s lips on his brow quickly calm him down and he sits next to her to help her undress with a much more serene face.

“You worry too much.” she tells him, brushing her mouth on his cheek. She can’t do much, since her arm is still in bad conditions; she can just stay still and occasionally move or lift her legs as he opens her shirt and pulls away her pants, so she uses her mouth to express her love and gratefulness.

“I worry just as much as it’s needed.” His confusion returns for a moment. “And who is Melana anyway?”

“One of your agents. The one who brought me breakfast and gave me these clothes.” Her expression is saddened as she asks softly: “You don’t know your agents?”

“Not all of them, no.” Solas gets up for a moment to retrieve clean bandages and continues once he’s back on the bed: “There are too many of them here and I prefer to maintain a professional distance between myself and them.”

Scarlet sighs and gives him unequivocal look that clearly shows what she thinks about this kind of behavior, but Solas ignores it with all the innocence in Thedas and ties the clean bandages on her arm, making a ribbon.

“There. All better now.” He delicately kisses the top of her shoulder, before smiling at her, cheeks red.

She stares at him for a long time, so much he grows timid and starts searching for her nightgown; he doesn’t leave her side, though, so she can still keep looking at him.

And she sees the Solas she loves and always will, the Solas with freckles on his nose and long eyelashes, the Solas with the adorable cleft chin and the sweet smile, the Solas whose eyes are kind and warm.

But she also sees new wrinkles caused by stress and anguish near the ones she knows so well and the shadows and bags under his eyes are darker and bigger than ever. He looks older, tired, drained, and she curses herself and her stupid idea of moving her arm so much to keep staying here.

She didn’t need to do that! If Abelas or someone else dares tell her she needs to leave, she will give them a piece of her mind, gathering all her boldness and stubbornness and unleashing them on them. Hurting herself will only add weight to Solas’ enormous emotional baggage.

She feels like crying again, but that would hardly help too. So after berating herself for the millionth time, she smiles and carefully move her hand to take Solas’.

He has found her nightgown under the sheets, but stops fixing the sleeves to turn to her and make sure everything is okay.

“Yes?” he asks, already getting anxious, and her smiles broadens as she leans in and kisses him. She brings his hand to her chest and places it there, against her breast, making him gasp and tense up.

It lasts only a moment, though: he quickly relaxes and playfully squeezes her breast through the breastband, eliciting giggles from her. He slips his tongue into her mouth and his other hand slides over her waist to grab her butt.

She giggles again and when they pull away, her smile is so sweet and blinding he can’t look away.

“ _Ar lath, ma vhenan_.” she says, her face all red. Then she gets as timid as him and mumbles, looking at her useless hand and ignoring altogether her left arm:

“I want to make love to you.”

He replies after a short pause, as he tucks red strands of hair behind her ear:

“I know, _vhenan_. I want that too.”

He raises her head with a hand under her chin and smiles, the love and adoration that he has only for her written all across his pale face.

“But you are still weak and we cannot possibly roll in bed and embrace each other while your arm is in such delicate conditions.”

“I know.” She lets herself fall against his chest and he immediately wraps his arms around her. “I want it to be a special moment.”

She blushes and looks up at him with embarrassed, ashamed eyes and a question appears in his eyes as he caresses her cheek.

“So much time has passed.” she explains, murmuring. “I… I’m a bit rusted.”

Solas smiles and kisses her forehead, but before he can speak, she continues, words pouring out of her mouth quick like water: “I-I touched myself at night. When I thought about you and I couldn’t hold back anymore, I would touch myself and try to repeat your movements, but…”

She whines and hides her face against his chest, huffing. Solas’ chuckle reverberates pleasantly in her ears.

“But it wasn’t the same?” he concludes smugly and she nods, adding: “… Not without your hands and voice.”

He kisses her hair and reveals, his proud smugness turning into her same shyness: “I touched myself too, but everything felt cold and empty and I hardly found release. It was not the same without you whispering sweet things in my ear.”

He runs his lips across her hairline, then moves down to her nose, where he plants a kiss.

“For now our time in the Fade will have to be enough, my love. But I promise you…” He lowers his voice and his arms tighten around her. “I will _devour_ you and give you all the pleasure in this world once you are feeling better. I will make up for all the time we spent far from each other.”

Scarlet giggles, her blush now one of happiness, but she sees the way Solas’ eyes sadden as he looks at her stump.

“And for many other things too. Wait a little more, _vhenan_ , and I swear I will make amends for all the pain I caused you.”

“Solas…” she starts, not wanting to hear him say those things, but he shakes his head and hides his face against her hair again, sighing softly.

“I felt disgusting and filthy every time I touched myself while thinking about you.” he says, caressing her back with one hand while taking the nightgown on the bed with the other.

“Why?” she asks and she can move her limp arm only enough to touch his leg and thigh. He sighs again.

“Because I don’t deserve you.”

But before she can protest and beg him not to say those things, he presses a quick kiss on her lips and smile as if nothing happened. She can still see traces of sorrow in his eyes, though, and is even more convinced of what she told Abelas.

She is going to stay here, with Solas, no matter what.

“Let’s sleep now.” he says, helping her put the nightgown on. “I will warn the guards not to bother us for any reason.”

Before doing so, he helps her get under the blankets and heavy furs of the bed; then he kisses her, gets up, tosses the bloodied bandages into the fireplace and goes to the door, opening it.

Adahl and Alas are waiting at each side of it, but this time they aren’t eavesdropping. They straighten up and turn when they hear the door open, but Adahl blinks twice and looks Solas up and down, trying to understand what he’s wearing.

“Lady Lavellan and I are going to rest for a while.” Solas says, ignoring the way the dark-haired elf is staring at him and focusing on Alas only, who doesn’t even dare glance at him, preferring to look at a vague point above his head. “Make sure nobody will come knocking.”

“How is Lady Lavellan?” Adahl asks without missing a beat and he even peeks into the room, not seeing Solas’ outraged look and Alas’ horrified face.

“Oh, there she is! Hi, Lady Lavellan!” The pale elf waves at her, grinning ear to ear, and his friend discards his fear and awe to look into the room and shyly wave as well.

Scarlet can’t lift her arm to do the same, but she smiles at them and nods, thanking them for their concern.

She feels a bit embarrassed, though, because she isn’t used to people who aren’t Solas and her close friends to see her in bed, dressed only with a nightgown, and Solas senses her slight uneasiness.

He is about to throw the two agents out of the room, when a small _crowd_ of people come to see how the Dread Wolf’s lover is doing.

Melana is on the frontline, raising herself on her tip-toes to better see into the room.

“Is she okay??” she asks, panicking. “Does she need any potions?”

The other agents are all city and Dalish elves and Scarlet recognizes some of them: she sees the old elf who planted the sprout on Enasalin’s tomb, the mage who moved the dirt and earth to cover his body, the young man who sang the first note of the eulogy.

They don’t dare step in, but they blatantly ignore Solas and focus on her only, letting Melana ask most of the questions or intervening only once in a while to wish Scarlet a good recovery.

Solas doesn’t know what to say or do. He stands near the door, observing that peculiar scene, that clear display of affection and warm respect that feels so odd in his base, a unique event that confuses him a lot.

He is also happy, though, and turns to Scarlet with a smile, relieved to see some of his agents already loving her and accepting her presence in the base.

However, their presence only increases her shyness and she is getting visibly red and nervous, torn between sitting up to better greet and thank them, and her modesty that stops her from being calm while wearing only a nightgown.

“She will soon feel better, but now she needs rest.” Solas intervenes, firmly pushing Adahl and Melana out of the room and blocking their sight with his body. He smiles and finally all the agents seem to see him and realize he’s indeed standing in front of them, wearing only an old pair of pants and a simple shirt.

They quickly and loudly apologize, while some of them stare at him like Adahl did, not believing their eyes. It’s like they didn’t know he was a normal person just like them and believed his complex armor was literally glued to him until now.

That realization disturbs Solas - he never wanted people to worship him, to think he is superior to anyone else -, but for now that problem will have to wait.

“I promise I will visit the rest of the base once I’m fine.” Scarlet says, before looking at Solas with wide, hesitant eyes.

“Of course.” he smiles tenderly and she relaxes, smiling back. Then he turns to the agents and continues with a firmer tone: “Now, please let us rest and go back to your tasks. We will discuss your progress later this afternoon.”

The agents say goodbye to them, bowing their heads, and disperse; Adahl and Alas remain near the door, guarding it, while Melana promises to bring new food from the kitchens for lunch later.

Just as Solas is about to close the door, a Sentinel approaches.

Scarlet sees him walk across the courtyard from the open door and once he’s near enough, the three agents notice him too.

Melana’s expression changes in a second and Scarlet realizes he’s the young Sentinel who offered his help in the woods.

“What do you want? Lord Fen’Harel and Lady Lavellan don’t wish to be disturbed.” Melana says tartly, but the Sentinel ignores her tone just like he did before and replies candidly: “ _Hamin, da’len_. I only wanted to know how Lady Lavellan is doing.”

“The only child here is your stupid boss.” she retorts, glaring daggers at him, but the Sentinel’s face is unreadable like a statue’s and he is not daunted by her words.

Solas reopens fully the door and glares at him too and so do Adahl and Alas. The Sentinel is surrounded by fire, but bravely walks through it like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

“Abelas didn’t do it on purpose.” he says, causing Solas to scoff.

“Truly? I am still not so sure about it.”

He turns to where Scarlet is and sees a bit of her anxiety coming back and showing on her face; he looks at her with extreme tenderness before turning back to the Sentinel and resuming his glaring.

“She needs rest.” he repeats. “Abelas will apologize to her later.”

And with that, he closes the door and casts a silencing spell that envelops the whole room, so that nobody will be able to hear what’s happening inside and Scarlet won’t be disturbed by any external noises.

“ _Vhenan_.” she calls, wanting desperately to reach out for him, but knowing it would be a bad idea.

She moves her legs under the blankets to let him understand she wants him to come to her and he does so, crossing the room in fast strides and slipping into the bed, resting at her side.

He scoots closer to her until their bodies are pressed against each other and she can reach his waist without moving her arm too much; he embraces her, careful not to hurt her, and entwines their legs together.

“That was a bit rude.” she says softly, massaging his thigh. His answer is a kiss on the nose.

“That was _necessary_. To be honest, I was expecting Abelas to apologize immediately.” He frowns, narrowing his eyes at the wall behind Scarlet. “The fact that he hasn’t done that yet is maddening.”

“He will do that later.” she says, tucking her head into the crook of his neck. Being able to do this, to stay like this after so much time spent apart, feels like a dream. “I… I wasn’t expecting all those agents to come visit us. I’ve been here only for a day, after all, and…”

“They came to visit you.” Solas corrects her with a chuckle, moving to look at her, and her eyes get sad, much to his worry and surprise.

“ _Vhenan_?” he calls and she raises her eyes to him with a concerned look on her face.

“Solas, you need to trust your agents more and build good relationships with them.” She turns serious and confident. “It’s important! You will feel better and…”

“I am already feeling better with you here.” he says, smiling innocently and pulling her back into his arms. She gets squished against his chest and grumbles, making him chuckle and snort.

“Solas.” she insists, pouting at him. “I’m serious. You can’t lead an organization without trusting your agents.”

“But I trust them!” he assures her, before letting his innocent and mischievous smile come back. “I trust them to make a good work.”

She groans and he laughs harder, and the sound is so beautiful and she missed it so much that she can’t really stay mad at him. She laughs with him and only when their laughter has subsided, she continues:

“Remember the Inquisition, how loyal and content to work there the soldiers and agents were? It was like living in a huge family and you knew you could count on your people.” She kisses his chin. “And they knew they could count on you. It was a nice feeling, Solas.”

He smiles, nostalgia tinting his smile, and says: “You remembered the birthday of many people. And when you didn’t, you would check the list of all the members of the Inquisition to see if anyone was born that day and tell Josephine to prepare presents for them.”

“Well, knowing that your leader doesn’t even know about your birthday must not feel very nice.” she mumbles, blushing, then lights up and exclaims: “Solas! Why don’t you ask your agents when their birthday is? You could start by doing that first!”

He watches her with an amused smile and a raised eyebrow and she pouts again, moving her knee so that it bumps again his stomach. He grunts and retaliates by pinching her butt, making her giggle.

“I could help you!” she continues after calming down, her voice melodious and enthusiastic, traveling in the warm room and filling it with light. She smiles and he sees all the love she has for him and cannot refuse.

“That… that would be great.” he concedes, smiling goofily. He tries to imagine himself giving presents to his agents, but his mind can’t form that image in his head.

A rush of embarrassment tints his face red and Scarlet notices it; her smile gets sweeter, patient, and she caresses his thigh under the blankets.

“Solas.” she starts, but he quickly interrupts her, looking at the collar of her nightgown instead of her face: “I’m not good at these things. I’m not good with… people.”

“I know. I just don’t want you to feel lonely and secluded in this room all time.” She kisses his nose. “But you are right, birthdays may be too much. You could start with their names…?”

She smiles at him again, but he remains serious and glum. She wants to lift her hand and caress his cheek, but her arm won’t let her.

“I would never feel lonely with you here.” he finally says, whispering the words as if he was a shy child revealing his most inner feelings. “I never feel lonely with you, _vhenan_.”

Then a terrible doubt starts gnawing at him and he gasps, looking at her with wide, shocked eyes.

“You will stay here, right? You won’t leave once your arm has recovered, will you?”

Scarlet’s heart begins to beat faster and she is _so, so glad_ she didn’t hurt herself even further to make sure she could remain here!

She feels stupid too, because she can’t believe she really thought he would have asked her to leave.

She now knows that not even Abelas and his Sentinels, not even Mythal in the flesh, could convince Solas to make her leave his base.

“Can… Can I stay then?” she babbles and his anxious expression shifts into astonishment and even outrage.

“ _Of course_ you can, you silly girl!” He looks almost offended. “You thought I would force you to leave? That I didn’t want you here?”

“But what about the Sentinels and…!”

“If they don’t want you here, then _they_ will be the ones to go away.” he snarls, then sighs and presses his forehead against hers.

“ _Vhenan_ , I could never ask you to leave. Now that you are finally here, I have no intention of seeing you go.”

Relief fills her and she starts crying, although they are happy tears and Solas recognizes that. He smiles too and wipes away the droplets on her cheek with his thumb, but anxiety grips her heart again and she can’t help but ask:

“Solas, what if… what if the alternatives we found aren’t good enough?” Her hand on his waist shakes. “Then I will need to go back to my base and…”

“My love.” He brushes his lips on hers, sucks on her lower lips for a short second, and her breath hitches in her throat. His eyes are kind, warm, loving, and desperate at the same time.

“Don’t worry over these things now. Let us enjoy the time we have and then…” He swallows his tears and tries to smile. “Then we will think about the rest. Your arm still hasn’t recovered and there is much I want to show you before we discuss your discoveries.”

She nods and kisses his eyes, a sweet attempt to dry the tears shining on his eyelashes. Her hand slowly searches for his and he immediately gives it to her, their arms resting flat at their side as her fingers play with his.

“I need to call Dorian. I’m sure Leliana’s letters already reached him.” She sighs. “She and the others in my base must be losing their minds.”

“I sent a messenger to them this morning.” Solas kisses her forehead and chuckles seeing her surprised face. Her mouth even turned into a cute ‘o’. “I reassured them about your wellbeing and if they really are rooting for us so much, then I am sure they will leave us be.”

“Oh yes! Definitely!” She grins, immensely relieved, and kisses him, before cuddling up against his body, her head in the crook of his neck again. He starts kissing her hair and she adds softly: “Still, I will need to ask Dorian to organize everything for our discussion. He has the majority of our papers and studies.”

“We can worry about that at another time. Now sleep, _ma sa’lath_.” Solas presses his lips on her forehead. “I will take you to the most beautiful of dreams.”

“Solas.” she calls, already feeling the call of the Fade. He is probably using a spell to help her sleep better and her eyelids feel heavy, but she manages to keep her eyes open long enough to look at him and smile.

“ _Ar lath, ma vhenan_.”

The last thing she sees and hears is Solas smiling back at her and saying: “ _Ar lath, ma uthlath_.”

 

\- - - -

 

She finds herself to be in a strange forest, unlike the ones Solas brought her to in the past.

He is nowhere to be seen, but she is fully aware of being in the Fade and that only happens when Solas is with her, shaping the Beyond around her and making her realize she is dreaming.

But if he’s not here, then…

“Hello there.”

She gasps and swirls around, trying to understand where that unknown voice is coming from.

Someone chuckles from beyond the trees and she tenses up; she has no powers her, no means to defend herself with.

Even though she is not a mage, a demon might still find her interesting enough to harm her. Many of the inhabitants of the Fade know who she is, after all.

She realizes she has her left arm here. Whoever made this dream for her thought about that and even though she isn’t sure she likes it - she will miss it even more once awakened -, at least it will be easier to defend herself, should the need arise.

“Who’s there?” she asks, praying Solas will sense her presence and find her soon. This never happened before: what’s taking him so long? Maybe he still hasn’t fallen asleep?

A rustle, then sticks and leaves crack in the woods, and Scarlet stumbles back. The Fade changes slightly due to her fear and discomfort and the light around her gets dimmer.

“Solas!” she calls, her voice shaking, echoing in the infinite vastness of the Beyond. “ _Vhenan_!”

Then a hooded figure stumbles out of the bushes, cursing in Elvhen and kicking the thorns and branches that are tearing their cape.

“ _Fenedhis_ …!” the figure curses one last time, burning with a wave of their hand the last wood tugging at their clothes. “I really chose the worst place to make an entrance!”

Sensing her shocked stare, the unknown person straightens up and Scarlet can see he is an elf: a middle-aged man wearing Mythal’s _vallaslin_ and whose violet eyes shine playfully under the worn-out hood.

He looks… kind of shabby. Even his staff, which is just a long, ordinary stick, looks like it saw better days.

He actually reminds her of Solas. Even his face and the peculiar light in his eyes are somewhat familiar.

“Are you… Are you alright?” she asks, not daring to come too much close. The other elf looks surprised for a moment, then smirks and tilts his head sideways.

“I am, _da’len_. My, but you are cute like a button!”

Scarlet blushes and looks down, embarrassed. She never knows what to say to people complimenting her like that; she is used to Solas complimenting her in his sweet, adorable way, but strangers are another matter entirely and she now wants to leave this place as soon as possible and stay with her _vhenan_.

The mysterious man groans and quickly apologizes, noticing her distress: “Ignore the ill words of an old man, _da’len_. It seems I still talk too much and at the worst times.” He can’t help but add, though: “Speaking of old, aren’t you too young to be with that bastard of Fen’Harel?”

Scarlet stammers a few words, taken aback, then says with great confidence, putting her hands on her hips and using her ‘Inquisitor face’: “My age doesn’t matter and I’d like you not to call him like that!”

Then she gasps and realizes what he just said and what he’s doing.

“You are a Dreamer, aren’t you? Are you one of Solas’ agents?”

“Pretty _and_ clever. Now I see why he loves you and admires you so much.” The hooded elf twirls the staff in his hand and opens wide his arm, bowing slightly: “My name is Felassan. It’s an honor to finally meet you, Inquisitor.”

“Slow Arrow?” Scarlet tilts her head. “That’s… a peculiar name.”

“Perhaps, but I think it fits me quite well. You see, I _was_ an agent of Fen’Harel and my intervention actually shaped the events following the Temple of Sacred Ashes.” Felassan’s smirk grows. “I was entrusted with an important task, but I failed it. On purpose, to be honest. And so Fen’Harel wasn’t able to access to his precious network of eluvians until much, much later.”

“Oh! He mentioned you once!” Scarlet remembers perfectly their conversation in front of the giant eluvian, even after all this time. She isn’t as scared as before, but she prefers to stay cautious for the moment and discover what this man wants from her and why he didn’t follow Solas’ instructions.

“He said you had to take the eluvians from Briala, but you did not succeed.” She instinctively rubs her left arm, her mind confused for a moment by its _presence_ and the lack of pain on the right one. “But I didn’t ask more. We were… busy with other matters.”

“Yes, I know.” A shadow of sadness passes over Felassan’s face, even though it doesn’t last much. “I’m sorry for what the Anchor did to you, Inquisitor. Unfortunately the ancient Orbs are as bothersome as nettle in your pants.”

She chuckles at that, but her questions are still many and so she asks, using as much tact as she can: “Why… Why didn’t you take control of the eluvians?”

“Mh, well…” Felassan waits a little before answering, preferring to find a comfortable spot under a tree first. Once he’s sitting, he peels off a piece of bark from the tree and munches it with gusto, exclaiming: “This is what I was talking about!”

“Umh… Felassan?”

“The answer is simple, dear Inquisitor. I wanted to give this world a chance. And I didn’t want Briala to suffer. She is a dear girl.” He grins at her and his teeth are partially brown due to the bark.

He then plays with the piece of wood in his hand and adds: “This happened six months before the explosion, by the way. Fen’Harel was understandably angry at my betrayal.”

That last word sends a cold shiver down Scarlet’s spine and she knows that something isn’t right.

She knows Solas well enough to also know that he wouldn’t ignore a betrayal like that. There must have been some consequences for Felassan.

“Are you… Are you alright?” she asks again, not really knowing _how_ to express the doubt burning in her mind. He seems to understand what is going on in her head, though, because his smile gets smug and sad at the same time.

“Of course I am. Now, Inquisitor…”

“I’m not Inquisitor anymore.” she says. “I disbanded the Inquisition. Now I only lead a much smaller organization to find a better way to deal with the Veil, but…”

“Yes, I’m aware of that. However, you are still the Inquisitor to the eye of many and I thought you liked the title.” Felassan snorts amusedly. “Probably not anymore, mh? It’s the same for Fen’Harel. At first he liked it, because he knew it gave hope to the slaves and scared the Evanuris shitless, but now it’s just a burden.”

He tears the piece of bark in half and hands her one piece, explaining: “Want it? It’s good for headaches.”

“I… I’m fine, thank you.”

“Lucky you! It’s like my head is splitting in half.” He tosses one of the two pieces into his mouth and changes topic: “I’m glad you mentioned the Veil. That’s why I brought you here, actually. I want to talk with you about that, but I fear we don’t have much time.” He looks up at the sky visible among the foliage and leaves and sighs.

“Fen’Harel is looking for you and I can’t keep you hidden here much longer.”

“You don’t want to meet him?” Scarlet gets nervous again and her number of questions increases. “Felassan, what happened? Did Solas…”

“Listen.” He looks back at her and this time his expression is serious and grim, almost impatient. “I didn’t come here to talk about me. The Veil is what counts right now.”

She takes a deep breath and sits on the soft grass. She is wearing a simple elven dress, but doesn’t pay it much attention, focusing on the elf before her instead.

“What do you know about it?”

“I know that it will fall. Even without Fen’Harel’s intervention, that thing would come crashing down anyway. But that’s not important either.” He lifts two fingers. “Right now, there are two possible outcomes. First one: Fen’Harel follows his own plan and makes the Veil fall. Lots of bad shit happen, but the elves and maybe the dwarves too are powerful again, immortality and magic come back, and the human civilization disappears. The Qunari people too, probably.”

Scarlet gulps and nods and hopes the hands on her laps aren’t shaking too much.

“And the second outcome?”

“You and your beloved Fen’Harel find the right solution and all the races survive. The world won’t be as _perfect_ as before,” he grimaces using that word, “but the elves will be immortal, while the other races will gain an extremely long lifespan. Magic won’t come back fully and it won’t be the same for everyone, but everything will be way better than now.”

“It… it sounds like a perfect world to me.” Scarlet says softly, not daring to hope too much. It’s impossible not to, though, and she realizes she is smiling brightly and even crying with joy.

“So an another solution exists! I knew it! I knew there was another way!”

“Oh, yes, there is.” Felassan doesn’t look as nearly as enthusiastic. In fact, he sounds bitter and painfully ironic. “Pity that this new way means the return of the Evanuris, while Fen’Harel’s original plan would let them stay in their prison forever, with no chance of escape.”

Scarlet pales and her shoulders drop. She gawks at him, feeling helpless, and stammers: “B-But… What if we find a way to let everyone survive and keep the Evanuris locked away at the same time?” She leans forward and repeats, rising slightly her voice due to panic: “Felassan! What if we…”

“Improbable. Either you sacrifice nearly everyone, but ensure those bastards’ eternal defeat, or you save everyone, only to start a war none of you can win.”

Scarlet’s tears of joy become ones of despair and she stares at the ground, her gaze blank and empty.

Felassan’s eyes are now sad and full of misery. “The Evanuris have changed, Lady Lavellan. Their prison is a place of shadows and illness, but they found a way to thrive in it. If they were nearly invincible before, now…”

“Why didn’t Solas tell me about this?” she murmurs. “He knows about it, right? Why didn’t he tell me?”

“Because he loves you, of course.” Felassan’s smile is sad just like his eyes. “He loves you so much he is willing to see the Evanuris return if that means giving this world a chance.”

Scarlet starts crying harder and her sobs fill the silent woods; the Fade shifts around them again and she sees little wisps floating near her legs, attracted by her sorrow and pain.

“He changed a lot too and I’m glad for that. Who knew that my small act of rebellion would have influenced things so much?” He chuckles and pops into his mouth the last piece of bark. “There is another thing you must know. It’s about Mythal.”

Scarlet raises her head and surprise manages to replace the bitter sense of dread consuming her.

“She… She said that the world will know a reckoning. A reckoning that will shake the very heavens.” she recalls, thinking hard about their conversation in the Fade. “Solas told me that the Evanuris murdered her. Does she want revenge then?”

She gasps, suddenly realizing something, and Felassan’s smirk is both proud and bitter.

“But then she must want us to follow the other way! She needs the Evanuris to be free to make them pay, right?”

“Yes, but Mythal is not the same anymore too. Gone is the All-Mother. Perhaps she never existed in the first place. Now only vengeance burns in her and she won’t stop until the game is won.”

“So what…”

“Solas thinks she is dead, that she paid the price to give him the power he needed to succeed, but it’s not like that. She _tricked_ him.” He narrows his eyes. “She still lives and even if you truly find a way to keep the Evanuris locked away while saving everyone, she won’t be satisfied.”

He looks down, his face and _vallaslin_ shifted by rage. “She will open their door herself if necessary. She is as dangerous as them at this point.”

“What… what do you mean she paid the price?” Scarlet shakes her head and thinks about it. She needs as much answers as possible. She needs to _understand_.

“Wait, you said she gave Solas her powers?”

“Of course! Did you never wonder how he became so powerful after leaving the Inquisition?” Felassan scratches his cheek absentmindedly and shrugs. “He truly believes she’s dead, that she really sacrificed herself for the cause. He has always held his mother at too-high esteem.”

“ _Mother_?”

A strong gust of wind blows in the forest and Felassan tightens his lips into a thin line. His grip on the staff is so strong his knuckles turn white.

“He’s coming.” he says, looking at the never-ending woods in front of him. He turns to Scarlet and adds quickly: “Lady Lavellan, don’t tell him you spoke with me. Pretend a curious spirit kept you here to talk. Understood?”

“W-Wait!” Scarlet springs up and takes a step forward. “Please, tell me more! Is there really no way to beat the Evanuris? There must be something, no matter how powerful they have become! If all races united for a common cause…”

“I highly doubt that.” he snorts, slowly getting up. He dusts his pants nonchalantly, ignoring her panic and concerns with incredible ease.

“You now understand why Abelas wants you out of that base as soon as possible. He always felt the Evanuris were going to come back, sooner or later, and he even prepared for that eventuality, but he had no idea it would happen like this.”

“I can research more solutions! Better ways to save Thedas and keep the Evanuris at bay!”

“Didn’t you listen?” Felassan shoots her a hard look. “In that case, Mythal will intervene.”

“But that means she would free the Evanuris to kill them even if Solas proceeded with his normal plans!”

“Yes, but he doesn’t know that. He thinks the elves would know a new age of peace and joy. He is sure she’s dead, remember?” He tilts his head and finds the strength to smile with amusement: “Your Inquisitor skills are a bit rusted, my dear.”

She ignores him and thinks of all possible ways they can go through this, survive this. She needs to talk with Solas and their friends. They need to find a way - together -, if not to deal with Mythal, then to prepare for the battle against the Evanuris.

“I hope these information will help you somehow.” Felassan says, then he smiles sadly: “Maybe you will see me again soon. Oh and…” He looks almost paternal now and a touching sweetness enters his violet eyes. “Say hi to Briala for me if you have the chance, alright? She must miss me a lot.”

“Wait…!”

A strong wind blows again and a wolf howls in the distance. She gasps and turns to the direction the sound is coming from, but when she looks back at the tree Felassan is gone.

The wolf is nearer now and she sits back on the grass, forcing herself not to appear panicked and upset.

But the wisps are still floating near her legs and she gathers them in her arms, her lips trembling, and watches them as they try to catch the tears falling from her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH MY. This chapter sure is full of important info ; v ; Of course this all speculation, since we still know nothing about Solas' plan, the Veil, and what Mythal really wants, but this fic will basically show my ideas and theories for the future!
> 
> Writing Felassan was really fun, even though you probably already know that the Felassan in this fic can't be the Felassan we all love ;_; Not exactly, anyway.
> 
> Things are getting serious now ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


	4. What We Need To Fight For

The wisps in her lap thrill excitedly and she realizes Solas is near.

She is used to his wolf form and so she doesn’t gasp or cry out when she glimpses his eyes among the trees; but then something changes and she isn’t looking at a normal wolf anymore, but a much bigger animal, and his eyes aren’t blue, but _red_.

And there are six of them, three on each side of his face.

She can see the outline of his body behind the trees and he’s way higher than them now; his hot breath ruffles her hair and the air around her gets warmer.

He seems to never end, to reach for the greenish sky above, and black tendrils move near him, like long strands of fur blown away by the wind.

But there is no wind now and Scarlet knows those tendrils are not fur, not really at least.

The wisps float to him and there are spirits in the distance, whispering curious, and part of her mind is telling her she is really seeing a wolf, that this is just another of Solas’ lupine forms, but another part of it is in awe and cannot understand completely what is standing before her.

But then in those red eyes she sees the same love and tenderness Solas always has for her and the giant wolf whines softly, as if he’s expecting a reaction or a question or a reply.

She realizes he looks very concerned and anxious. He is _scared_ , because he doesn’t want _her_ to be scared of him.

So she smiles and calls softly: “ _Vhenan_.”

The wolf makes a happy sound and she sees his wagging tail move behind him; she giggles and Solas makes another gleeful noise, before resting down on the grass, snout between his enormous paws, his six, red eyes staring lovingly at her.

“I could never be scared of you.” she says, scooting to the edge of the woods to be near him. Solas wags his tail faster and blinks at her.

The air is hotter in his proximities and her skin tingles, as if caressed by those strange tendrils she can still see coming out of his body.

She can touch him now and so she does, reaching out for his nose with her right hand, forgetting about her left one that Felassan recreated for her here.

She slowly rests her palm upon the warm snout and Solas closes his eyes as she starts to caress it, a relaxing movement, up and down, up and down. He grumbles happily and she giggles, elation filling every corner of her body and soul.

The Fade around them gets brighter and the spirits and wisps move closer.

“Oh, _vhenan_!” she exclaims, leaning down to kiss his nose. “You are so cute!”

Her lips feel warmer after the kiss and she feels a strange pull in her chest; she can breathe normally, but her lungs also seem filled with something lighter than air and she hears faint music in the distance, together with a faint, sweet smell.

She stares into Solas’ many eyes and each is the same, intense red color, but she also sees something different in each of them: for a second, she could swear she saw Skyhold reflected in one; in another, she catches a glimpse of a beautiful field full of flowers, in another a golden forest and then…

And then he makes her snap out of it, poking her face with his wet nose. She blinks and looks at him, at loss for words, but enthusiastic and full of wonder.

“ _Vhenan_ , what was that? I saw…!”

He whines softly and she knows him so well that she understands what he wants to tell her: to not think about it too much and not worry.

“Is this your complete wolf form?” she asks, stroking his nose. She is still sitting at the edge of the woods and the trees are like a barrier that separates them: if she moves into their quiet shade, she will be at the other side, the side occupied by Solas, where the Fade feels more alive than anywhere else and that sweet scent and the music get stronger.

She doesn’t hesitate. She scoots on the grass some more and enters the soft, green-tinted shadows of the forest, leaving the clearing and joining Solas.

She can see his body better now and it’s enormous like she thought, so much her mind once again cannot fully comprehend what her eyes are seeing. She has to look away, but she smiles at him to show him that she isn’t scared, merely a bit overwhelmed by that new sight.

And then she giggles again, resting her hands on the soft fur of his neck and pressing her face against it. She scratches the tender space behind his huge ears and a low, long rumble echoes in Solas’ throat, making her giggle harder.

“Who is the cutest wolf in Thedas?” she coos, scratching faster, and he grumbles and thumps his head against her, gently to not make her fall, but it’s clear he’s enjoying the cuddles a lot.

“Who is it?” Scarlet continues, kissing the top of his head. The sweet smell invades her nostrils and she sees random, but familiar scenes in her mind: the vast fields of the Hinterlands, the kitchens of Skyhold, the rainy, gray sky of the Storm Coast.

She falls into the black, soft fur and it seems it never ends, it’s like an endless, infinite black sea that embraces her and pulls her gently to its warmest depths, where more places can be seen and where dreams and nightmares are stored without distinctions.

She feels safe, protected, and nuzzles his neck, inhaling the sweet scent and letting more scenes come into her mind, distant memories, often belonging to others who dreamed them or saw them in the past, sometimes just pure, undiluted knowledge from which she can learn more.

There is a small village of Tal-Vashoth in an isolated coast of Rivain and their children are thin and dirty, but always happy and carefree; two famous merchants of Ferelden are married with each other and they sell their wares with secret smiles; Arlathan was filled with corruption and wickedness, but also incredible wonders and magic and its loss that the world suffered hurts like the Blight that first poisons and kills the dwarves underground.

There was a wolf, the same she is hugging now, the same she gave her heart to, the same who gave his heart to her, that used to walk the old world with long, unhurried strides, followed and called by children and elders alike. He brought joy and good dreams everywhere he walked in and the Fade and the spirits were his home and friends.

Scarlet barely notices it, but the black tendrils that are so similar to Solas’ fur are now covering her body like a mantle or cape. They don’t hurt her and they aren’t overly tight; they are just there, holding her against the strong neck, and she can pull away whenever she wants.

But she doesn’t want to pull away, to stop hugging him. After so much time spent apart, they are finally together and perhaps if she falls deeper, if she plunges further into his welcoming, black, warm abyss, then they will be together forever and everything will be alright…

“It’s you.” she murmurs and she can see Solas in his wolf form look at her even though her eyes are closed and her face is still pressed against his neck. She sees him in her head, but she knows it’s real, that he’s really looking at her. “You are the best wolf in Thedas. The kindest and the sweetest.”

The six, red eyes get brighter, shiny like red stars against the dark curtain of the night, and he makes that loving whine again. She smiles and is ready to let herself go completely. She can almost feel it, his soul, thrumming and beating like his giant heart just next to hers and if she keeps going, then she will surely reach it and then they will fuse them together and not even the Evanuris will be able to divide them ever again…

It all stops when two gentle hands lift her head up, slowly, but firmly, and suddenly there is Solas in his normal, elven form in front of her.

Scarlet gasps and looks around, her breathing erratic, only to scream when she sees the ethereal, formless faces of many spirits stand just a few inches from hers.

“Please leave.” Solas tells them and the spirits, their curiosity and expectation not sated, hesitate for a long moment before stepping back, fading into the trees and tall grass. They wait there, still hoping that whatever they wanted to happen will finally come.

Scarlet moves her eyes back to Solas, pale and shaking.

“Breathe, _ma vhenan_.” he says lovingly, stroking her cheeks. “Breathe.”

“What happened?” she asks. “I… I was caressing you and then I saw… I saw…”

“Forgive me.” he says, his expression shifting into great worry. “I didn’t think about the effect that form could have on you. Even with the Fade restrained by the Veil, it seems it can still be quite strong.”

Scarlet tilts her head, confused, then his attire catches her attention: he is wearing simple elven clothes just like her, but also a long, black cape, made of the same fur he had as a wolf.

“Was that your complete wolf form?” she repeats, remembering he didn’t really answer her before.

He does this time, nodding slowly, a timid smile tugging at his lips.

“It felt different in old Elvhenan.” he explains. “But you experienced some of it.” The anxiety she saw before in his red eyes comes back and he asks shyly, fearing the worst: “Did it scare you?”

Scarlet smiles at him and sighs fondly, shaking her head.

“Oh, Solas.” she says, cupping his cheek. “I told you, I could never be scared of you.” She beams at him and exclaims: “You were so cute! A big, fluffy ball of adorableness!”

He chuckles, face all red, but they are interrupted by the spirits whispering with each other and Scarlet is reminded of their presence and their mysterious behavior.

“Are they waiting for something?” she asks, whispering, and when Solas doesn’t answer, she turns to him and sees his sad face. “ _Ma vhenan_ , what were they expecting to happen? Why were they staring at me like that?”

“They thought they were finally going to witness a fusion of souls again.” His smile is sorrowful as he speaks. “That was the final step in making love with another Elvhen before the Veil. Bodies lost all weight and only souls remained, ready to mingle and fuse together, until two became one.”

His smile turns a bit playful, roguish even, which surprises her.

“At least that’s what I was told. I never experienced it myself.”

Scarlet blushes and looks down at their joined hands, not-so-secretly happy that their time together in bed, in the waking world, has been Solas’ first time too.

But now she yearns for this fusion of souls, she wants to take this next step with him and experience it together. She is sure she caught a glimpse of it in the Vir Dirthara, the memory of those two lovers dancing in the air, and now she even tasted it for a second, a brief moment that filled her entire being with warmth and peace and love, so much she could almost touch it.

“Why…” she starts, timid, fearing his answer. “Why did you interrupt it?”

“Because the Fade isn’t like it used to be, my love. You were going to get hurt and lose yourself.”

He squeezes her right hand and adds, softly: “As I said, you also experienced the effects of my wolf form. You saw the old memories and knowledge that I carry within me. The dreams I saw, remembered, gathered, and created over the millennia. The sleeping souls I met. That would have hurt you greatly too, especially since you aren’t used to such magic.”

“Should the Veil be destroyed… Should the Fade get normal again…” Scarlet takes a deep breath and sees hope shine in Solas’ eyes. “Then… would you do that with me? Would you teach me how to watch the dreams you carry without danger? Would you…”

She stops, shy and embarrassed, and doesn’t know how to pronounce that question burning in her throat. This means more than asking him to make love, this would be becoming one single entity and maybe he…

“Oh, _ma vhenan_.” he murmurs, his voice shaky with emotion. He wraps his arms around her and presses his lips on hers, just for a moment though, because he wants to look at her as much as possible.

“Of course I would fuse my soul with yours, it’s one of my greatest desires! It has been since we kissed in the Fade, so many years ago!” He kisses her again and this time he pulls back only when they have to catch their breath again. There are tears in his eyes.

“My love, oh my love!” he exclaims, cradling her face in his broad, calloused hands. “I would show you so many things, so many more memories and dreams! I would show you the most beautiful magic and spells and take you to the fairest skies to observe the clouds and stars in peace. And then, once night falls after days of eternal peace, I would lay you down on our bed, the softest bed one can imagine, and touch your heart with mine, for all eternity.”

Tears fill Scarlet’s eyes too and she chokes on a sob. She thinks about what she learned from Felassan, the terrible outcome that awaits them no matter what they do: they are damned if they make the Veil fall normally, but also if they find another way and everyone survives.

Either the Evanuris or the vengeful, furious Mythal will be their ruin. This, they cannot avoid and she doesn’t know what to do, because she now knows what Solas intends to do - for her! - and she knows their probabilities of success are low.

There are so many things she would like to do and see with him, but they cannot do them. They won’t even be able to experience that world of magic with their friends.

And now, just a day after her arrival in his base, she is left hopeless and feels helpless, useless, so full of despair that even breathing is hard. The Fade reacts to her emotions and the curious spirits disappear, frightened, while the air gets colder and demons whisper menacingly from afar, refrained only by Solas’ presence.

“My love.” he whispers, lulling her in his arms as she cries and sobs on his chest. “It will be alright. If these calculations you and Dorian made are exact, there might still be a chance to…”

“It won’t be alright!” Scarlet wails, digging her fingers into the fur of his cape, which Solas wrapped around her. “ _Vhenan_ , it won’t be alright!”

“Why do you say that?” He gives her a bittersweet, lopsided smile. “We cannot be sure until we study them together.”

She can’t tell him that she knows about the freedom the Evanuris will achieve if they proceed with this new plan she and the others so painstakingly worked on in the past, long months. She can’t tell him that she knows that _he_ knows about the real possibility of that catastrophic event and that he is doing this only for her.

So she bites her lips and presses her face against his chest again, hiding her tearful eyes there and letting his warm hands caress her back, while his fur cape embrace them both like a comfortable cocoon.

“Don’t have doubts.” he murmurs in her ear, his lips following the long, sharp shape of it. “You have always been a brilliant woman, _vhenan_. You of all people surely found the right way to make things better.”

She can hear a smile in his voice and so she smiles too, knowing he wants to reassure her and comfort her after witnessing her brief, but intense outburst.

She still feels weird, to be honest, and her tears don’t stop easily; panic and anxiety are all mixed together in her heart and head and she now fears the future, because she cannot see a good outcome anywhere.

Solas thinks that the world would be safe if he just proceeded with his normal plan, not aware of the fact that Mythal - _his mother?_ \- is in fact planning to free the Evanuris to kill them no matter what or who stands in her way.

Does he feel regret then? Does he regret choosing to follow Scarlet’s idea and plan? If he doesn’t now, he will sure do so in the future, when their enemies will be freed because of their actions and not Mythal’s.

And Scarlet doesn’t have the heart to tell him that his _mother_ actually tricked him and has every intention of doing it again, should he keep the Evanuris locked away in their prison. She just can’t do that and she has the terrible impression that Mythal actually hurt him in the past, considering all the trouble he has in trusting other people.

“What are you thinking about?” he asks, nuzzling her cheek. “I can _feel_ you think hard about something, _vhenan_ , and even if I cannot see your face, I know it is not pleasant. Tell me what haunts you so.”

“I… I’m just worried.” she replies, not really a lie, and Solas hums, continuing to nuzzle her cheek with his nose and mouth.

“Don’t be.” he says, lifting her head so she can look at him. He passes his thumbs over her eyes and her tears finally stop flowing. He is smiling now.

“We will find a solution together.” he promises and her lower lip trembles again, because _she_ is supposed to reassure him, that’s why she is here, but instead she is only making everything worse and everything she discovered and studied until now feels stupid and dangerous.

Solas gets worried and brings his hands back on her cheeks to stare into her eyes, looking for an answer, something that might explain why she is so upset now.

“What happened, Scarlet?” he asks and that question alone makes her heart quiver. “You were so hopeful before. What frightened you so?”

She doesn’t answer immediately and he remembers something important that he momentarily pushed aside.

“I couldn’t find you sooner.” he says, brushing some red locks away from her face and eyes. “I usually can, but this time I couldn’t sense your presence anywhere in the Fade, even though I saw you fall asleep.” His eyes are still loving and kind, but firmness appears in them too. “Did you meet someone?”

She would smile, if she had the strength. As usual, he is so charmingly and terribly perceptive of everything, especially her emotions and feelings. The fact that she tends to be an open book around him and their friends doesn’t help.

“A spirit.” she answers, hoping the Fade won’t reveal her lie to him. Or perhaps it isn’t even a lie and she really met a spirit who just thought to be Felassan after being amazed by his life, just like it happened with Divine Justinia.

Solas hums and presses his lips on his nose before insisting: “What kind of spirit? What did it want?” He frowns and adds with a grumble: “It must have been a very powerful being. It was able to hide you from me for a time.”

“I… I think it was a spirit of Wisdom.” She shakes her head. A part of her wants to believe that what Felassan - or whatever that was - told her was not really wisdom, but a big mistake and that the alternative solution she found won’t really cause a mess, that everything truly will be alright.

Bu the rational part of her tells her that Felassan was probably telling her the truth, that he is right, and so his words really did contain wisdom, wisdom and knowledge that she absolutely needed, despite how much it hurt to hear them.

Solas’ worry grows and fear flickers in his eyes. He suspects she knows and he doesn’t want her to know.

He doesn’t want her to suffer, although it will be inevitable later. It sounds very familiar, it’s something he already did, but this time she _does_ know and doesn’t want him to know that yet. Not here and now, anyway.

“What did it tell you?” he asks, panic rising in him. “What did it say?”

“It just…” Scarlet hesitates for a moment, then smiles and shakes her head. “It just told me to be cautious with what the others and I discovered.”

Solas observes her for a long moment before sighing and smiling. He kisses her - and they both cling to that kiss as if their lives depend on it - and then hurries to reassure her again:

“It will be alright, _vhenan_. We will find a way. Now I know and believe this.”

Those last words have a special effect on her. She remembers what she told him in front of the eluvian, when her arm was on fire and his eyes were full of despair, and she realizes she wouldn’t give up so soon.

She never did that, after all. Even in the darkest times, even when everyone else believed all was lost or things couldn’t change, she kept her smile and hope strong in her heart and never wavered.

And now, just because she heard bad news from a spirit or a mysterious Dreamer, she can’t see any kind of light on the horizon anymore?

She gave up even before discussing about it with Solas and the others, she just let the news hit her and decided to stay down on the ground instead of getting up. This isn’t the Scarlet she knows and she can’t let this hurt Solas too.

Perhaps Felassan was wrong. Perhaps there is a way to defeat the Evanuris. They can find it, all together - elves, humans, dwarves, Qunari. Wouldn’t that be better than constantly watch over a group of homicidal assholes for all eternity?

_Var lath vir suledin_. That’s what she believes too and she won’t let fear defeat her, because that would mean the Evanuris already won.

So she will show Solas what she and the others discovered and together they will find further solutions to the new problem, one step at a time, until Thedas will be safe and whole and healthy again.

Hope comes back in her heart and she sighs relieved. She can do this. She was the Inquisitor and her stubbornness is second only to her infinite optimism and her love for Solas.

She pats her cheeks and face hard with the palms of her hands, so hard Solas makes a surprised, alarmed noise, but the sharp, sudden pain helps her think even better and her tears disappear.

Something touches her legs and she looks down: flowers bloomed where she and Solas are sitting and the trees have gotten taller and bear more fruits. Their leaves are more golden than ever before and the playful wisps come back, thrilling joyously.

“Are you feeling better?” Solas asks with a sweet, hopeful smile and she smiles back, nodding.

“Yes.” She roughly rubs her eyes with her left hand, so that tears will really have no way to come back, then looks down at it pensively. “Remove it, please?”

He blinks, taken aback, and she giggles in front of his goofy, endearing expression.

“I don’t like to still have it in my dreams. I don’t have it anymore in the waking world, so I tend to notice the difference when I wake up.” She kisses his cleft chin. “I got used to it now. And I don’t want to miss it anymore.”

Solas looks at her arm, then at her, then at her arm again in complete silence. Then it’s gone, as if it was never there, and the sleeve of her dress hangs loosely, much to her relief.

“Much better. Thank you.” she sighs happily, before kissing him and asking softly: “Can we change place too?”

He wraps the cape tighter around her as she rests her head on his shoulder; he presses his lips on the top of her head, asking:

“Where would you like to go, _ma vhenan_?”

“Somewhere more private!” she exclaims, but using a low, whispering voice; the spirits came back and are watching them from behind the trees again.

Solas recognizes the shyness in her voice and chuckles, resting one hand on her back and the other on her thigh.

“What about here?” he says and in a moment their surroundings change, the magical forest replaced by a familiar sight in just a heartbeat: it’s Scarlet’s clan, with its nostalgic hearth and aravels welcoming them.

“Oh!” Scarlet gasps, overjoyed. She would lie if she said she didn’t miss her life there. It has always been dear and beautiful to her, often full of danger and hunger, yes, but also sweet and festive like the sugar they used to steal from the humans.

Even though there is nobody in this dream - memory? - of the camp, it’s like everybody left just a few minutes ago: the fire in the hearth is still strong, food is waiting on the large, dry leaves and wooden plates they used to eat, and the aravels have been equipped and their sails opened to depart soon.

“I remember this place.” she says with a huge smile, looking around. “We are in the woods near Markham. We stayed here for two whole months, because there was a lot of food and the _shemlen_ didn’t bother us much.”

Solas saw memories of her clan before, she showed them to him at the start of the relationship, but they never explored the camp much, since they were so focused on her clan-mates and the events she most remembered dearly.

So now she seizes the chance to do exactly that:  to walk with him through the empty, quiet, but still lively camp and show him better how they lived.

She stubbornly ignores the rudimentary statue of Fen’Harel that can be seen in one of the farthest edges of the camp; she feels ashamed to even have it here and remembers painfully all the frightened prayers and bows of her head she offered it.

She wonders why he included it in this depiction of her early home. Perhaps he wanted it to be as most similar as possible to the real one and she squeezes his hand with love and tenderness, bringing him to the aravel she shared with her parents.

“I never showed it properly to you!” she exclaims, bouncing on her feet, and he chuckles seeing her finally so happy. He follows her inside and she is glad to see that everything is just as it was the day she left for the Conclave.

The Fade  changes itself depending on her memories and what she expects to find in this dream and if it wasn’t for the unfiltered, at times odd sensations and the different, lighter air and colors, she would think this was the waking world and she was really showing her clan to Solas.

It’s strange to be here after spending so many years inside much bigger rooms and quarters, where she had to share nothing with other people and all the space was reserved to her only.

She makes a happy sound when she spots the bed of dry leaves and old wool that she made with her mother; it’s not as soft as the mattress she had at Skyhold or the one in her new base, but it will always have a special place in her heart, because it’s related to many good memories of her childhood and the smile of her parents.

She sewed a colorful blanket using spare cloths that nobody else had a use for. She even managed to sew halla, aravels, and houses on trees on it, a childish, naïve depiction of Arlathan, the same Solas mentioned when they first talked at Haven.

Not only the style is a bit outdated - she can sew much better now -, but those embroideries also show how silly and ignorant she was and even though she has never been ashamed of her Dalish origins and culture - except for when she learned about the Evanuris -, she now feels a bit mortified and embarrassed.

Solas, clever and observant as ever, notices it and moves closer to her, whispering: “I love it.”

Scarlet blinks and stares quizzically at him, then realizes what he means and mumbles, looking away: “The lines are all wonky.”

He chuckles and lets her hand go to wrap his arm around her waist and pull her closer; he kisses her cheek and insists: “I love this place. Your clan, your aravel, the small trinkets and details that make it yours.”

She turns to look back at her private space. Above her bed, her father installed a small, short shelf made of wood and she put all kinds of things on it: colorful pebbles she found on the ground when she was little, beautiful pieces of clothes, her needle box and her set of colored threads, a small doll her mother made for her, a few books, and some pages full of silly drawings and ideas for clothes.

She groans and blushes even harder, looking away a second time.

“I was very young.” she mumbles and Solas chuckles again, endeared by her words and shyness.

“Oh, my love.” he whispers in her ear, making a pleasant shiver run down her back. “I love you so much.”

She melts at that and turns to him with a bright smile and wondered how she could ever fear the future, if he is at her side.

“I love you too.” she says, grinning, and slips her only arm around his waist as well, raising herself on her tip-toes to better kiss his lips and forehead.

“You know,” she then adds timidly, her smile a big goofy, “newly married couples would get a new private aravel all for themselves.”

Fearing she said too much, she immediately bites her lips and curses her stupidity, but Solas looks happier than ever and all the worries and darkness that haunted him the previous day seem gone now.

“And how did you imagine ours?” he asks, knowing perfectly what she was hinting at. Scarlet gets redder than her hair and the pillow on her bed and babbles something.

“Perhaps with many quilts and furs scattered on the floor?” he tries, a knowing, sweet smile on his lips as he brings them close to her ear. “And flower pots hanging from the ceiling, books on long shelves, and a large bed made of leaves against the biggest wall.”

Scarlet giggles, hiding her face behind her hand, but Solas gently pulls it away and kisses it while she keeps laughing.

“That’s… that’s a very accurate description of what I imagined, yes.” she admits, then she tries to poke his nose as he continues to kiss her hand.

Then she gathers more courage and blurts out: “I also imagined plushes and toys. For the children.”

Solas stops at that. They have been dreaming about their kids for years and once Solas even drew the map of a house Scarlet saw in a book, a little cottage where they could live together in perfect harmony.

And after seeing that picture, she could never stop thinking about it. If at first she imagined her married life with Solas in the clan, inside a private aravel, after finding that picture in a book she started dreaming only of that cottage.

Many of her clan-mates left the aravels to go live in the houses of Wycome: they found their own space, their own land, and transferred their families and lives there. They didn’t forget about their Dalish heritage, but they also accepted the change, accepted the opportunity to have _more_ and sometimes _better_.

Even though the aravels and the camps she made with her clan will always hold a special, warm place in her heart, now what she wants to see is that cottage. What she wants to hear is voices coming from the second floor; what she wants to smell is not the pungent smell of smoke coming from the hearth at the center of the camp, but sweet herbs and dry flowers in the cozy living room and honey and cinnamon in the warm kitchen.

She wants to have a bedroom to kiss Solas and be kissed by him on their marital bed; she wants to play with their children in their rooms. She can still remember the map Solas drew, she can remember all the rooms he planned, all her timid suggestions, all the wishful dreams she had.

And so she cries. Quietly at first, but then she bursts into sobs and Solas is quick to pull her closer again and kiss her wet cheeks. They are not tears of despair, but of hope and love instead and he knows the difference and doesn’t panic.

“Solas!” she cries, clinging to his shirt and letting him embrace her with the cape again. “Solas, do you remember that cottage I saw in that book? The map of it you drew?”

“Of course I remember it.” He kisses her nose and jaw and then looks into her eyes. There is only love and tenderness on his face. “Why do you ask?”

“Bring us there, please. Show it to me now. I want to see it and… and I want to see it with all the magic restored. With our friends and all the races of Thedas alive.”

Solas doesn’t reply this time, too stunned to do so. Scarlet smiles at him through her tears and dries them, hurrying to say: “You don’t have to come with me, if you don’t want to. Just transform the Fade around me when I’ll leave the aravel and…”

“Why do you want to see it?” He shakes his head and takes a deep, shaky breath. “I never had the courage to explore fully such a dream. I knew it would hurt immensely, because I thought…”

“Because you thought it couldn’t come true. But we have to hope now, Solas, we have to hope more than we ever hoped before!” She swallows her last tears and cups his cheek. “ _Ma vhenan_ , we have to see with our own eyes what we need to fight for. We have to see the beautiful future that awaits us if we give our best and never stop hoping.”

It’s Solas’ turn to cry now. He closes his eyes and tears run down his cheeks; he makes no sound, but he exhales slowly and relaxes as Scarlet presses her lips on his wet face like he did before with her.

“Solas, please. I need to see it. I need to see that future.” She knows he’s thinking about the Evanuris, about the freedom they will find if they proceed with the alternative plan, about the chaos and destruction they will bring into Thedas.

Her resolve gets stronger, her desire to save everyone and ensure a happy future for everybody, for herself and Solas, grows until she can barely contain it.

So she takes a deep breath and rests her head on his shoulder, stroking his back and saying softly: “It will be alright, _ma vhenan_. You told me so, remember? It will be alright.”

“Yes.” He tightens his hold on her. “Yes, you are right.”

He gently pulls away to look at her and smiles, his hands resting once again on either side of her face, squishing her cheeks. It was something that she used to do a lot with him, one of their sweet, domestic games that they often played together, and she giggles, blushing when he leans down to kiss her nose.

She feels a vibration in the air and even though the aravel is unchanged, she knows the outside will be different and they will see a totally new landscape.

“Ready, _vhenan_?” Solas asks her, smiling. His hands are shaking and there is a bit of panic in his gray-blue eyes, but he looks impatient to see what their future might indeed hold if they are clever, strong, and lucky.

“Yes.” Scarlet leans in to press her lips on his and just as they pull away to get out of the aravel together, a new sound echoes loudly in the air.

She yelps, jumping out of her skin, while Solas maintains a certain composure, but looks as shocked as her. The noise becomes louder, clearer, until Scarlet recognizes it and exclaims:

“The magic crystal!”

And that’s when they wake up.

 

\- - - -

 

The crystal Dorian gave her is indeed ringing, but Scarlet has little strength to take it here in the waking world: the wound on her right arm still burns a lot and the stress and pain she went through this morning, together with the little food she has been eating, left her weak.

Solas fetches it for her and hands it to her, watching her with concerned eyes, noticing her pallor. He is clearly also worried about what Dorian might say, despite what she told him the day before.

She opens the locket and taps her fingertip on the shining crystal: the noise stops immediately and they can hear a loud gasp.

“Scarlet?” Dorian’s familiar voice tentatively calls, slightly echoing due to the effect of magic, and she laughs, happy to hear him.

“Hello!” she says, grinning at Solas and then at the crystal. “Guess where I am?”

Dorian splutters something nonsensical and finds the right words only after a considerate effort.

“You…! You almost _killed_ me! You wouldn’t answer my calls and then I got a letter from Leliana which said you and that agent had disappeared and…” He snarls, then makes a noise similar to a sob.

“Oh, Dorian!” Scarlet exclaims, feeling wretched and guilty. “Forgive me, I didn’t mean to worry you all! A lot happened and…”

“Are you alright? Are you really there with _him_?” The magister hesitates for a moment. “Where are you exactly?”

“I…” Scarlet looks up at Solas, but his gentle smile tells her that he cannot reveal that information to her nor to their friend. Not yet, at least, so she hums and answers as best as she can:

“I am in Solas’ base. Everything is fine, Dorian, there were just…” She sighs and grief strikes her heart again. “Enasalin is dead. The Venatori killed him, but you probably already know this.”

“Yes.” Dorian replies with genuine sorrow. “I am so sorry, my friend. He sounded like a nice fellow.” A pause, then: “Leliana’s letter said they found traces leading to some elven ruins. They followed them and found blood, that poor agent, and a broken eluvian. Did you escape through that?”

“Yes. Enasalin opened it for me, but he didn’t have the chance to follow me.” She remembers with great guilt those moments, although her memory of them is a bit fuzzy due to the poison which numbed her mind.

“Are you hurt?” is Dorian’s next logical question, to which she has to answer truthfully: “… An ugly arrow hit me, yes. Solas healed me.”

“An _ugly_ arrow?” The magister sounds outraged by her choice of words. “What do you mean, _an ugly arrow_?” He then chokes on another sob and groans something about ‘white hair’ and ‘weak heart’.

“Well, it was poisoned, but just a little bit!” she hurries to say, panicking, but Dorian just panics more and demands to know all the details.

Solas cannot stay quiet any longer and blurts out, almost without realizing it: “I removed the poison from her body, Dorian. She isn’t in danger anymore, she just needs to rest and eat.”

A long silence follows, so long Scarlet thinks the magic connection got interrupted. But suddenly Dorian speaks again and his tone isn’t angry or bitter, just pleasantly surprised and even relieved.

“Now that’s a voice I didn’t think I would hear ever again. Or at least, not like this.” He chuckles and quickly speaks to Scarlet: “See?? I told you everything would be fine! You are finally reunited!”

“Yes.” Scarlet giggles, blushing as she looks up at Solas for a second; she blushes even more when he grins and kisses her.

“Was that the sound of a kiss?” Dorian sounds _ecstatic_. “Finally some good news in this wretched excuse of a world! Say, when can I come there to disrupt your domestic bliss?”

Solas tenses up at that and Scarlet doesn’t miss the slight jerk of his hand and neck as he stares down at the locket with horror and worry.

“Well…” she starts, biting her lower lip. She actually wanted to spend more time with Solas without thinking about all the things they must do, all the researches they must study and evaluate.

She knows they will have to face that soon, but for now, even though her hope is stronger as ever, all she wants is just stay with him and pretend the world isn’t on the brink of war with the Qunari, that the Veil isn’t getting weaker day by day, and that they won’t have to fight a group of insane false gods soon.

For the first time since she became Inquisitor, she wants to be selfish for a bit and take moments of happiness when she finds them, like Inquisitor Ameridan suggested to her.

“May we wait a little more, Dorian?” she says and she sounds so hopeful and earnest that the magister can’t really say no, although he sighs and replies:

“I know you two need to stay alone with each other and I can’t believe _I_ am saying this, but… we really need to talk about this Veil matter. I looked at our notes yesterday, while trying not to go mad with worry for you, and I believe we came really close to our objective.”

She glances at Solas and is happy to see him more relaxed, at ease.

“I know, Dorian.” she says. “I told him so.”

“I’m glad to hear that you finally changed your mind, you stubborn ass.” Dorian continues, talking to him, and this time he sounds a little annoyed. “And I would give you two all the time in the world if I could, but the others are getting impatient, they are waiting for answers and results, and the Qunari are more relentless than ever. I’m much worried about them, to be honest.”

“I am dealing with them as well.” Solas says, but he doesn’t offer more details and smiles mysteriously at Scarlet’s intrigued look. Of course she knew he was having his own way with the armies of Qunari trying to invade the south, but she never discovered how he did so.

“Excellent, but this won’t last much longer. First you were so eager to see this Veil fall and now you play for time?” Dorian scoffs and grumbles something. “Listen, I will prepare everything and everyone while Scarlet recovers. The sooner we find the right way to destroy the Veil _and_ let everyone survive - because I would very much like to survive, thank you -, the sooner you two will be able to smooch each other and finally be happy for all eternity.”

Scarlet makes a timid noise and scoots closer to Solas; he delicately slides an arm around her shoulders and replies softly:

“Very well. A week should be sufficient.”

“I’ll inform Leliana to send all the notes on my desk here through one of Solas’ agents.” Scarlet adds, remembering every book and piece of paper that she left in her room. “I will show those to Solas in the meantime. Then we will meet…”

She looks at Solas, not knowing how to proceed. Is it alright for the others to come here? But where is _here_ , exactly? Will they be accompanied by his agents through the Crossroads, using the eluvians?

“You will come here.” Solas concludes, as if he read her mind. “My agents will show you the way.” He frowns and hurries to add: “Not before a week, however. That is the time you must give us.”

“Good. See you in a week, then.” Dorian’s tone softens a lot. “Scarlet, my friend, enjoy yourself. I promise I will bother you only to wish you good morning.”

She laughs and replies affectionately: “You are never a bother, Dorian. Feel free to call whenever you want.”

He says goodbye again, this time sounding more choked up than before, then the communication stops and the crystal goes silent, its azure light slowly fading away. Scarlet closes the locket and leans back onto the pillows with a relieved sigh.

Solas doesn’t waste time and moves to her side, placing a tender kiss on her left shoulder.

“That went well.” she says, raising her hand to caress his cheek, and he kisses her palm.

“Yes. I am glad we still have some time to relax and recover before…” He swallows and panic enters his eyes again. “… Before focusing on harder matters.”

Scarlet nods and motions him to rest his head on her shoulder. But he shakes his head and, after resting down on the pillows as well, he moves her to his chest instead.

She giggles, kisses it, then asks: “Will you show me the base today?”

“Are you feeling better? If you want, we can sleep some more.” He chuckles and twirls a strand of red hair around his finger. “Although, now that you are here, the Fade seems extraordinarily dull.”

“That’s the special effect I have! Making people forget about their favorite hobbies.” she jokes, squealing and giggling again when he pinches her butt.

“We shall visit the base, then.” he says, smiling smugly at her. He even has the nerve to wiggle his eyebrows as his hand moves down to her butt again. “There is a library here too. I am sure we will find many interesting books to spend our nights with.”

“Oh.” She pouts, pretending to be offended. “ _That’s_ how you want to spend our nights? This wound will heal soon, you know?”

Solas laughs boyishly at that, cheeks red and eyes twinkling with joy; Scarlet laughs with him and they are about to kiss and lose themselves into each other, when…

A knock on the door interrupts them and Solas frowns, sighs, and turns to it without even moving a leg.

“… The effect of silencing spell ended while we were sleeping.” he mumbles, then raises his voice: “Yes?”

“Forgive me, Lord Fen’Harel!” Alas’ nervous voice responds. “Abelas is here and asks to talk with you.”

Solas and Scarlet exchanges a surprised look, then she hurriedly retreats under the covers and blankets to hide her attire. Solas is even more relaxed than before, basically giving no damns about the fact that Abelas is going to enter the room.

Then he seems to change his mind and asks with a scowl: “We expected him much sooner. Apologies should not be delayed so much.”

“I came not to apologize!” Abelas replies from behind the door, causing Solas to get furious and lose all composure. “The agents you sent to Minrathous have returned with important news!”

“ _Not to apologize_?” Solas rises and walks slowly towards the door, fists closed at his sides; his is the gait of a wolf, Scarlet recognizes it now, and his jaw is tightened, his teeth gritted.

He is about to tear the door off its hinges and punch Abelas in the face, or worse.

“Solas!” she calls him, sitting up faster than lightning. “ _Ma vhenan_ , come here!”

“You _must_ apologize to her!” Solas shouts, ignoring her. “Do it now! Enter and apologize to her!”

A pause, then Abelas’ serious and somber voice answers: “I will not apologize to that _shemlen_. She is going to ruin us all.”

Solas shouts some elven words Scarlet doesn’t understand, but before he can lunge at the door and set Abelas on fire, she stands on wobbly feet and runs to him.

“ _Vhenan_!” she calls him, putting herself between him and the door. His eyes are glowing blue like they were doing that morning, after Enasalin’s funeral. “ _Ma sa’lath_ , look at me.”

He does so and the glow immediately disappears, letting her see how angry and hurt and sad he is.

“I’m sorry, I…” He shakes his head and then exclaims, shaking: “You shouldn’t be treated this way!”

“Hush, silly wolf.” she says softly, taking his hand and smiling at him. “Everything is fine. Nobody is treating me badly here.”

“But…!”

“Abelas, give us a minute.” she says, raising her voice a bit. “We just have to get dressed.”

“… Very well.”

They hear steps and the clank of armor fading away, then she turns to Solas again: he is glaring at the door and he really looks like an impetuous and bold cub.

She giggles and kisses him for a long minute and that’s enough to calm him down; he hugs her tightly as soon as the kiss ends and she rubs her hand on the small of his back because that’s the only part she can reach with her burning arm.

“Would you help me dress?” she asks, kissing his neck, then gasps: “Solas! Those beautiful clothes you made for me, they are all dirty with blood now!”

“We will clean them, don’t worry.” he says, finally smiling again, even though his voice is hoarse.

He brings her to the chest where he kept all the gifts he couldn’t send her; he retrieves new clothes from there, promising she will see the rest of the presents later without hurry, then helps her to put them on.

After that, he collects the pieces of his armor he just left on the ground and wears it quickly, every movement showing expertise and elegance. He still can’t buckle his belt well, though, so Scarlet helps him with that.

“Ready?” he asks her, just like he did in the Fade, as they were about to leave the aravel. This time it isn’t a dream, this time they are going to step out into his base and she will be finally able to spend the whole day with him, exploring it and meeting his agents.

“Ready.” she nods with a bright smile, which Solas returns with a kiss.

He opens the door and the first thing they see is Adahl and Alas falling on the ground, caught eavesdropping once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GOSH, THIS CHAPTER IS SO LONG. Every time I sit down to write a new chapter, my previous plans just get forgotten and the story takes its own course ; A ; I also apologize for the late update, my health hasn't been the best these days ; v ;
> 
> The cottage, [the children](http://lafaiette.tumblr.com/solavellanbabies), and the map come from my fic [Elvhen Glory](http://http://archiveofourown.org/works/6100747)!
> 
> I also thought that after so much stress, it would be normal for Solas and Scarlet to feel so emotionally unstable, but, as they said, everything is going to be alright ( ´ ▽ ` )
> 
> Now that they finally talked with Dorian, things can get in motion. The next chapter should be about the base, Solas' agents, and the problems with Abelas - if the fic itself and my brain will allow it :'D


	5. True Self

After glaring at Adahl and Alas who desperately tries to scramble back on their feet, Solas decides to start from the main courtyard.

It’s the one he and Scarlet are actually standing in right now: around them, the old, cracked, dusty ruins of the place Solas chose as his base stand in all their forgotten elven glory, offering shade to the rich grass under their feet and tiny nooks to the colorful flowers that grow everywhere.

There is a well too, as old as the base, and even from afar Scarlet can see ancient carvings on it and recognize the faint gilding of the upper bar as gold. There are also some pieces of golden mosaic left on its surface just like on the walls she saw last night, as they went to say goodbye to Enasalin for the last time.

The flowers are actually what makes the courtyard so beautiful, because not only their colours are so varied, but they are also rare and it’s a wonder to see so many specimens here, growing all together in harmony.

The trees too are wonderful: tall and large, but not imposing, they offer even more fresh shade than the walls and many agents are relaxing, writing, or training under their comforting foliage.

A faint path of golden and green tiles can be glimpsed under the dust and leaves: Scarlet recognizes some symbols encountered in other elven ruins she visited as Inquisitor; others are simply known to her because her Keeper taught them to her and all her clan.

But there are others that she doesn’t know and never saw before, so she spends a long time trying to decipher them while Solas decides how to better show her the courtyard.

“There are some interesting murals over there.” he mumbles and his voice sounds timid. That makes her raise her head and look at him in surprise.

He _is_ timid. His face is all red and he looks antsy and anxious, like a young boy on his first date with his beloved maiden. But they have been together for years, now, and they had their fair share of dates, so what is he afraid of?

_‘Does he fear I might get bored?’_ she wonders, then she understands.

This time they are having a date in _his_ place. He is showing her something that _he_ made, something that _he_ worked hard to organize and assemble: it’s his organization, it’s his small army, this is the base he chose and decided to renovate, these are the people he personally chose to work for him.

He hopes she will be proud of what he accomplished, even though at first the reason he did all this was to tear down the Veil in a destructive manner. He felt like he didn’t really have a choice back then, though, and many of the agents he has here are willing and happy to see the other races survive too, so she can’t be mad at him for that.

“There are more rooms that need to be cleaned and refurnished.” he continues, grimacing. “And… the kitchens are not much large, but the cooks assured me they are good enough. Also, lean on me, there are patches of moss on some parts of the ground and I do not want you to slip on them.”

He sighs, fearing his words and the wild exterior of the base made a terrible impression on her.

“Solas…” she starts, biting her lips not to laugh, but then  he lightens up and smiles at her, exclaiming: “The library! I almost forgot. Come, _vhenan_ , this is the briefest way.”

“Abelas is waiting in the library, my lord.” Adahl informs him, acting as he never eavesdropped on them and was caught doing so. “The agents who just came back from Tevinter are there too.”

Solas curses under his breath and coldly replies: “Then they will wait. I have no intention of seeing Abelas now.”

He tries to smile again and pats Scarlet’s hand, a reassuring gesture. “We might start from the kitchens, then, and grab something to eat.”

She is about to accept, but then she thinks about the argument that Solas and Abelas had and her promise to the Sentinel to come out soon to talk with him. If she and Solas makes him wait more, without showing any kind of interest and respect for what he and the agents have to say, he will get even angrier.

He already can’t stand her much. If she really proved to be the nuisance he thinks her to be, then there would be no hope to actually talk to him and establish a sort of friendly relationship with him.

She doesn’t want to cause problems to Solas. She doesn’t want him to lose the respect of his agents because of her. They need to convince as many people as possible that the Veil must not be destroyed carelessly, but that there might actually be a better way…

Although Abelas considers _that_ way and its consequences even worse. She must show him that not everything might be lost, even if they will cause the Evanuris to get free. And to do that, she has to win his respect and trust.

“No. Let’s go to the library.” She smiles at Solas and gently interrupts him before he can complain: “We will have all the time to explore the base later. For now focus on your agents and hear what they have to tell you.”

He looks flabbergasted. Outraged. Nearly offended by the mere idea.

“ _Vhenan_ …!”

She giggles and kisses his nose, as his utter surprise and confusion just increase.

“Don’t worry, I won’t listen to your conversation!” She shoots an amused look at Adahl and Alas, who blush and look away, then she beams at Solas: “I will read some books. Far from you and the others, so Abelas won’t think I’m spying on you. Do you have anything on sewing or food?”

Solas babbles something, then glares at her, but it’s more like a glare directed at Abelas and his bad manners and paranoia.

“You shouldn’t do this. _He_ shouldn’t do this. You are here now and I have no intention of wasting any more time. Abelas and those agents can wait. They _will_ wait, in fact.”

“No, they won’t.” Scarlet uses her Inquisitor voice now and it has a clear effect on Solas. He blinks and stares at her, more dumbfounded than before, as she continues with a small frown on her face:

“We will go to them, _vhenan_ , and you will hear their report and do whatever you do in these situations. I will wait for you and then we will continue our walk.”

She tugs at his sleeve and nods at a general, vague direction, smiling again and concluding: “Now, let’s go! I really need to read some new books.”

He looks about to whine and complain, but her pointed look and lopsided smile tell him to stop it and he can only grunt, scowl, and pout as they head towards a smaller building decorated with typical elven windows and carvings.

He glares at the path in front of them for the whole time, without pronouncing a single word, but his grasp on her hand is gentle and he carefully guides her far from the patches of moss and broken tiles.

He is still scowling hard when they enter the library and his mood only gets worse as he sees Abelas and a handful of agents standing near one of the large tables of the room.

The library is magnificent, despite its disarrayed look: there are long tables offering all the space necessary to sit, read, and study in peace and the shelves are as high and large as the ones Scarlet saw in the Vir Dirthara. They touch the ceiling, so sturdy ladders have been provided to reach the books.

Even here, there are old mosaics on the walls, telling ancient stories and showing long-forgotten events of a past that Scarlet barely knows.

The golden tiles on the floor have been accurately cleaned and repaired and magic fire burns in tall, round bowls on the walls: she has no doubt it offers an incredible light at night.

Abelas and the agents turn and raise their heads as they hear the doors open: the Sentinel scowls as hard as Solas, while the spies gasp and whisper with each other. They didn’t know Scarlet was here and they didn’t have the chance to learn of her presence, since they have just arrived.

Apparently Abelas didn’t think about informing them sooner.

Much to Scarlet’s relief, they don’t look annoyed or scared by her presence. Like before, she sees curiosity and surprise in their eyes and in some cases even awe and respect. Most of them bow their head as she and Solas approach and the younger ones look impatient to speak to her.

“Lady Lavellan will remain here for a while.” Solas announces, ignoring completely Abelas. “I trust all of you will make her stay a pleasant experience.” As he says this, his eyes slowly move to the Sentinel, who doesn’t reply.

The agents reassure him and promise they will do so, then they address Scarlet directly, greeting her and bowing again. Part of her shyness comes back, but she holds it in check and kindly greets them back, professional and gentle like during the days of the Inquisition.

“I will go find some interesting books.” she tells Solas, but then hesitates, not knowing whether she can kiss him or not. His agents are here and he might feel embarrassed, maybe he would prefer to keep such displays of affection private. He _did_ kiss her in front of Adahl and Alas, but…

He notices her hesitation and chases it away with a smile and a warm kiss: one or two agents giggle, only to be silenced by the others, and a corner of Abelas’ mouth twitch downwards, but Solas looks as happy as ever and Scarlet can’t help but smile too.

She quickly walks away from the table, red like a tomato and still smiling, and does her best to find the farthest bookshelf and stay there without interrupting them. The library is large and its ceiling tall, though, so Solas’ voice echoes well, especially because he has no intention of lowering it.

Despite her attempts, many words still reach her ears and hearing what they are talking about is inevitable, even if Abelas tries in every way to keep their tones low: the agents discovered more about the Qunari’s intentions.

Apparently their efforts in Tevinter are stronger than ever and things are getting dangerous for the Imperium. Should the Qunari attack now with most of their armies, the humans would have no way out.

“We must save and secure all the innocents we can.” she hears Solas say. “Slaves, children, elders, women, everyone. All of those who cannot defend themselves, those who never chose this war, those who have no means to escape and leave Tevinter on their own.”

“What about the ruins we found, sir?” an agent asks, ignoring Abelas’ request to speak in lower tones, and Solas replies: “Make sure nobody else will find them. Use magic if necessary.”

“Shouldn’t we try to dig more?” Abelas intervenes, forgetting about his own voice. “If those documents and information you needed are there, then…”

“We will interrupt our efforts for now.” Solas says, calm as ever, and a collective gasp can be heard in the library. He doesn’t even hesitate or pause before continuing: “I need some time to study what we have gathered until now, what Scarlet and the others discovered and… and to prepare everything.”

“No, I know what you need time for.” Abelas hisses, before smashing a hand on his table. Scarlet grimaces at the sound, but doesn’t move from behind the tall bookshelf and forces herself to stare at the book open in front of her with all her willpower.

It’s useless, because Abelas’ furious whisper reaches her all the same, whether she wants it or not:

“You need time to spend more blissful moments with your beloved Inquisitor, while our people struggle in this world and those who call themselves Elvhen forget and twist our lore with each passing day.”

“You still haven’t apologized to her.” Solas icily reminds him, but the Sentinel snarls.

“I did not mean to hurt her and she knows this, but her presence here is dangerous. Whatever she told you, whatever she promised you, you know it is too dangerous. You know we cannot afford to follow her plan.”

“Her plan might work. And if it is as good as she and our friends believe, then we will follow it.” A pause, then Solas concludes, sounding confident and certain: “We will deal with all the consequences like we would have dealt with the ones borne out of our original plan.”

A heavy silence follows and Scarlet realizes the agents don’t know that the Evanuris will be freed if the Veil is destroyed following her way. She can feel their confusion in the air and also Solas’ panic, because he doesn’t want them to know.

Many of them are willing to let the other races survive and share with them the joy of a restored Thedas, but if they knew the price to pay was a terrible calamity, perhaps the worst one Thedas ever knew, then Scarlet has no doubt that they would refuse to follow Solas.

Apparently Abelas has the good sense to stop talking about that in front of the agents, because he tiredly concludes: “Wait, if you must, but my Sentinels and I will keep searching for every scrap of ancient magic that we could use. When the time finally comes, we will be ready. Although I ignore how ready one can be for such a thing.”

She hears the steps of his armor on the tiles, but they are interrupted by Solas’ voice.

“This world is not as terrible as you believe, _lethallin_. Give it a chance.”

Abelas doesn’t reply, but his steps sound faster, angrier, as he leaves the library and loudly closes the doors behind himself.

Solas sighs, then asks the agents more questions about their mission, the things they saw and discovered in Minrathous.

Scarlet is perfectly aware of having listened to a good part of their conversation already, but even now she can’t really stop the words from coming to her and no matter how many books she opens on the table, they aren’t enough to catch her attention.

“Panic is rising in the city. The Magisterium is convinced the Qunari will strike the decisive blow soon and it drives them mad.” an agent says and Scarlet’s hand moves to her pendant. Is Dorian really alright?

“Our forces have been as discreet as possible, but words about you have spread in most corners of Thedas, my lord, and there have been… retaliations against the elves. We will try to save and defend the most we can.”

“Good.” A moment of silence, then Solas adds: “If they refuse to work with us, ask them to go to Lady Lavellan’s base then.”

Scarlet smiles and blushes at that and then she hears Solas’ steps come closer to where she is. She hurriedly looks down at all the books she opened, only to realize they are written in ancient Elvhen.

“ _Ma vhenan_.” he calls softly, approaching her and resting a hand on her back. “Come, don’t stay here alone any longer.”

“But…” she glances at the bookshelf behind his back, because behind it there are the agents he was speaking with.

“Only Abelas would think you want to eavesdrop and spy on us.” he says with a sad, lopsided smile. Then his expression softens and he looks at her face, her eyes, her body, her right shoulder whose bandages can be seen peek out of her shirt.

She blushes and looks down, a bit self-conscious about that new outfit. It’s comfortable and light like the old one that got dirty with blood at Enasalin’s funeral, but it’s also a bit tighter and it highlights the form of her breasts and butt more.

When she raises her eyes and sees the look on Solas’ face, she wishes this room was completely empty and her shoulder well again just to push him on one of the tables and ride him until sunset.

He clearly knows what she is thinking about, because a roguish grin splits his face in half, causing Scarlet to blush even more and groan; she tries to hide her face against his pelt and he can’t hold back, bursting into a boyish laugh that echoes in the library and makes the agents jump out of their skin in surprise.

“Just you wait until I can move my arm again.” she mumbles, smiling and pouting at him at the same time, while Solas cradles her face in his hands and kisses it with a low chuckle.

“Oh, I will, my love. I will patiently await.” he promises, peppering her face with tickling pecks, and every time she tries to return them he steals more kisses or plays with her lips.

His hands move to her waist and she moves hers to rest it on the small of his back, but he stops her before she can do so.

“Do not strain yourself, _vhenan_.” he says, brushing one lock of hair behind her ear, and she seizes the chance to finally kiss him back. He smiles and painfully steps back to let her move, saying: “Let’s go back to my agents, now. I want you to listen to what they have to say.”

The sudden lack of contact hurts her too and the dream they shared in bed comes to mind, a bittersweet memory that makes her heart beat too fast, but soon their hands are entwined and they step back into the aisle like that, without hiding their love, and the air becomes breathable again.

Scarlet greets the agents again and they kindly inform her of the current status of Tevinter. Things don’t bode well for the Imperium and the familiar weight of the world that she has felt on her shoulders since she became Inquisitor, comes back.

She feels responsible and Abelas’ words hurt deep: this week she and Solas want to spend in a sort of blissful limbo of denial is undoubtedly selfish and even though she knows they deserve it, that they aren’t asking _that_ much, she feels guilty and almost desires to put her armor on and go back into the matters of politics, war, espionage.

“We tried to infiltrate Magister Pavus’ house to protect him and keep an eye on him, my lady.” an elder agent says, confirming the suspicions she and Dorian always had. “But he managed to discover our people every single time.”

“Yes, I know.” she chuckles. “He often complained about the amount of spies who pretended to be slaves looking for a master. When he started having paid servants, the offers doubled.”

“But he always found out who my agents were even then.” Solas says and he gives her an amused smile. “I guess he is used to recognize such people, thanks to his Tevene education. You, on the other hand…”

She blushes and sighs, aware of how naïve she can be sometimes.

“I know, I know. I trusted all the people who entered my base way too much. Maybe I thought nobody could infiltrate us because Leliana was there most of the time.” She makes a low sound, then asks timidly: “… Who are the agents Enasalin used to talk to while he was in my base?”

“There are currently two there, my lady.” one of the elves in front of her promptly answers. “They…”

“No, wait!” She thinks hard about it, tries to remember all the reasoning she made in her room, then starts with her first suspect: “Let’s see… I always thought the old elf who brought us food was kind of suspicious…”

“Really, now?” Solas says, smirking smugly, but he doesn’t confirm nor deny it and she sticks her tongue at him, pinching his hand to retaliate. He laughs like he laughed before, in front of everyone this time, and the agents look mesmerized by that sight, as if they never saw laugh him before.

That’s probably the case, Scarlet thinks with sadness and she doesn’t even hesitate or let her shyness stop her: she presses a sweet kiss on Solas’ cheek, then quickly goes back to the main topic to stop herself from combusting.

“Will you keep an eye on Dorian from afar for me?” she asks the agents, noticing how some of them are smirking at each other or whispering. The two or three who are listening intently to her nod and promise they will try to infiltrate his house only to protect him from his enemies. They don’t have to discover what he is studying anymore now.

“He has many, doesn’t he?” she sighs. “Venatori and Qunari emissaries threaten him every day, but he has always been able to stop them before they could arrive to him.”

“His enemies increased, I fear.” the elder agent who spoke before says and she turns to him, eyes wide. He clears his throat and hurries to explain, not seeing Solas’ panicked and irate expression: “Reliable sources have told us that a large part of the Magisterium and the Altus caste are against him and his Lucerni party also because of his friendship with you and his affiliation with your non-Inquisition, my lady.”

“What?” Scarlet feels her face and back grow cold, as if blood left her body. She shakes her head, not feeling Solas’ grip on her hand. “Why? We gave them no reason to…”

“Everyone knows about you and Lord Fen’Harel, my lady.” another agent, a young woman, continues. “They… uh… don’t trust you and consequently they don’t trust Dorian Pavus and all the reforms he’s trying to make.”

Another huge weight settles upon Scarlet’s shoulders and she feels sick. Dorian never told her this, on the contrary he always reassured her that everything in Tevinter was fine, except for the Qunari looming on the horizon. Not even Leliana informed her about this.

Are her other friends having similar problems too? She hasn’t had the chance to visit them yet, she was too busy with her organization and could only exchange letters with them.

She never traveled much too far from her current base and every contact with the outside world she had never showed her what Thedas really thought about her relationship with Solas and her work.

She did try, however, to change the opinion of the world about him: her agents have the order to spread no disinformation and ill things about Fen’Harel, but only report the truth and the true objective of their organization, that is change his mind, not kill him.

But she knows how hard it is to change people’s mind and even some members of her clan are perplexed and worried by her behavior and choices, so she knows she shouldn’t really be surprised.

It seems that once again nobody believes Solas to be a good man, not even when there are individuals finally defending him and his reputation. This fact, together with the thought of their friends suffering because of this, hurts her immensely and she wonders how the world can be so blind, so cruel, so stubborn.

She turns to look at him and sees his pained expression, which quickly shifts back into anger directed at the two agents, who babble an apology.

“Solas…” she says and his face betrays a deep sadness again as he turns to her. “ _Ma vhenan_ , this is not your fault.”

He looks pleasantly surprised by her words and she smiles at him, bringing his hand to her chest and continuing: “This is not a fate you cannot escape. One day everyone will know that Fen’Harel is not a monster. One day everyone, not just me and the others, will love you.”

He smiles, but it looks more like a pained grimace.

“I very doubt that.” he replies softly, his voice hoarse, and she knows that means he’s forcing back tears.

Fury aimed at Thedas, at the foolish magisters of Tevinter, at the blind high powers of the Qun, at every idiotic noble of Orlais, at every stubborn Dalish and city elf, boils in her and her expression hardens, steel-like.

“Then I will make them see!” She turns to the table, then back at Solas, unable to stay still, and babbles, trembling with rage: “And if they won’t see, then… then… then fuck them!”

She is not one to curse and swear bad words, so Solas looks even more surprised, the agents snicker, and she blushes and feels the urge to apologize. But then Solas laughs and the sound isn’t sad, but relieved and happy instead, and she stares at him as if it is a miraculous sight.

_‘It is.’_ she thinks holding his hand tighter. It’s so good to finally see and hear him laugh like this!

“Thank you, _vhenan_.” he says and they forget about the agents, just looking at each other, Scarlet with a cheerful, shy smile, Solas with an amused, grateful one.

Then one of the spies speak, saying they have nothing else to report, and Solas distractedly gives them permission to leave.

“We will stay here for a while.” He beams at her. “There are many books I want to show you.”

“I…” She giggles and shakes her head, admitting: “I tried to read some before, while you and Abelas were talking, but they were all in ancient Elvhen and I couldn’t understand much.”

She raises her eyes to him and adds ashamedly: “Sorry. I didn’t mean to listen. I…”

“Oh, _vhenan_.” he chuckles, leading her back to the table where her books await. “I had all intentions of letting you hear everything. And Abelas knew that.”

“Are things in Tevinter really that bad?” She stares at the table and books without really seeing them, worried about Dorian and everyone else trapped in Minrathous. “Dorian and Leliana never told me anything and she is supposed to know everything about these things!”

She turns to Solas, pale, and he wraps an arm around her to give her comfort.

“My agents never encountered any of yours there, my love.” he says, resting his forehead on hers. “Perhaps Leliana never thought it necessary, since Dorian and other contacts were there, or perhaps she considered it too dangerous.”

“Maybe.” Scarlet kisses his chin, then nuzzles his wolf pelt, deepening the embrace. “I always took care of the matters in southern Thedas, while I left Tevinter in Dorian’s hands. I… I gave him a too big burden.”

“No, _vhenan_. That is a burden he would have in any case. He cannot avoid it, just like Varric can’t avoid his in Kirkwall.”

She frowns and asks, already knowing the answer: “Are people giving him problems too? What about the others?”

Solas hesitates, but his hand never stops rubbing gently her back and his lips are pressed on her hair.

“They are all having some problems with nobles, politics, and so on. Their ties to you, the old Inquisition, and consequently myself are not good ties anymore.”

She grumbles, but her rage passes soon, because Solas chuckles, touched by her endearing fury, and so she is able to look at him with a small, but bright smile.

“Does wanting to kick every noble’s ass make me a terrible person?”

“No.” He kisses her. “It makes you a very sensible and wise individual.”

She giggles and hides her face against his pelt again, resting her hand on the small of his back like she wanted to do before. Solas panics a little, fearing she is hurting herself, but she reassures him and even pinches his butt.

He starts kissing her forehead and hair, so she raises her head again to catch his lips and pepper his face with sweet pecks.

They spend some more time there in the library: Solas finds books written in the Common Tongue for her, old but readable, all about food or sewing like she requested, but he also helps her read some parts of the ancient elven books she found earlier.

There, in the vast library drowned in light and the smell of old paper, time stops and it almost seems to them that they are in a different reality, separated from the base, from the soldiers and agents walking just outside the doors, from Thedas; a personal pocket of reality where nothing can bother them, where worries and pain don’t exist.

They didn’t sleep much after Enasalin’s funeral, so lunch time soon comes and Scarlet’s stomach grumbles its request for food.

“Sorry.” she babbles, blushing, as the noise echoes in the large room. Solas chuckles, holds her closer to his chest, not letting her get off his lap immediately, but then he hurries to bring her outside, already listing all the nutritious and healthy dishes she needs to eat to recover her strength.

“We will visit the base after lunch.” he promises her, kissing her cheek as they head back to their room, but Scarlet stops on her tracks and turns to look at the buildings nearby, at the agents bowing their head to them and entering a smaller building: smoke comes out of its roof and she understands those are the kitchens and perhaps even the dining hall.

“Is that where your men eat?” she asks, noticing their huge grins and excitement, which only grow when a bell resonates in the air. Someone, probably the cooks, are calling them to eat, like it happened in the barracks at Skyhold.

“Yes. It is a large space, big enough to accommodate everyone. The old remnants of a ballroom, I believe.” He looks at the last agents who are entering the room, then quickly averts his eyes, smiling at her. “As I said before, the kitchens are much smaller, but useful all the same. Do you want to see them now and personally tell the cooks what you would like to eat?”

Scarlet hums, still staring at the wooden doors, typically elven and typically carved and rich like the ones she saw during her travels, then turns to him and smiles timidly.

“I’d like to eat there, if you don’t mind.”

_That_ surprises Solas. He looks at the dining hall, then at her, then at the dining hall again and each time the frown on his forehead increases.

“Why?” he asks and panic immediately appears in his eyes, together with a bit of puppy-like sadness. “You don’t like our room?”

“I love it!” she reassures him, resting her hand on his cheek. “ _Vhenan_ , I love it _a lot_ , but we should really spend some time with your agents. _You_ should spend time with them. Remember what I told you this morning in bed?”

He pouts and looks a bit disgruntled, like a child who doesn’t want to eat his vegetables, but he nods and makes an affirmative sound. Scarlet giggles, but she has to bring her arm back down because her shoulder is burning again, so she gives him a sweet kiss instead.

His pout is smaller than before now.

“You don’t want them to worship you or treat you like a god or a powerful general.” she says, matter-of-factly, getting serious again. “But if you retreat in your room every day and just give them your orders from there, they will never find the courage to see you as more than that, Solas.”

She takes his hand and entwines their fingers, feeling how calloused and rough his are.

“Please, _vhenan_ , I know how it works. For months the people of the Inquisition saw me as the Herald, as a holy figure or an invincible, godly leader, when all I wanted was to be seen as _me_.”

She tugs at his hand to make him look at her, but the wind is blowing her hair in all directions  and she can’t see well. Solas shields her with his body and helps her brush back her red locks and she keeps going:

“You want to be seen as Solas, but you never give them the chance. Give it to them and your life here in the base will be better, easier.”

“It’s already better now that you are here.” he says softly and Scarlet is forced to use a harsher tone.

“Solas!” she exclaims, making him pout and look away again. She sighs and slowly takes his chin to move his face back to her. “Listen to me. I may not always remain here. My presence may be required elsewhere to continue our research or to deal with those stupid nobles, and I don’t want to leave knowing you will be _alone_ again, without anyone you want to count on.”

She hisses, curses softly her shoulder, then before Solas can change topic and ask her to see her wound, she hurries to continue: “I want to leave knowing you will be surrounded by people you trust and respect, people who can finally see you not only as a guide, but as a friend and an amicable figure too. Just like the people of the Inquisition saw me, saw you, saw each of our friends.”

“The people of the Inquisition didn’t see me as…”

“Yes, they did!” she interrupts him, glaring at him. “They respected you, Solas, and they always came to you for help and questions. And don’t pretend you don’t remember it!”

He huffs, his cheeks redder than before, and doesn’t deny it, so she continues: “It’s because you were _yourself_. You acted like your true self, like _Solas_ , and even though you were burdened by your secret, you came to us like the man you were before becoming Fen’Harel.”

She pleads him with her eyes and concludes softly, but passionately: “ _Vhenan_ , I don’t want to be the only one to see this lovely, kind part of you. You have to show everyone how wonderful and gentle Solas is, not how cold and distant Fen’Harel is. This too will make you happier.”

Eyes cast down, he doesn’t answer. Scarlet rubs her thumb on the back of his hand, a soothing movement that helps him relax, and soon he raises his eyes to hers. They are full of tears and so, so tired, but also somewhat relieved.

He then glances at the doors of the dining hall and listens to the humming and indiscernible sounds of the agents talking and eating there. Finally, he looks back at Scarlet and murmurs: “Wait here for a moment, please.”

He gives her a kiss, then heads to their room. Adahl and Alas are still guarding the door and she wonders when they will eat. Perhaps another agent will send them something or they will go later, when someone will come to guard the door in their place?

Why do they need to stand there, anyway? Solas was never the type to lock himself into a room to avoid any kind of contact with people: at Skyhold, he was happy to spend his time and study in the rotunda, where many people passed through, where everyone could have access to, where he could hear and talk with the people on the upper levels. He never asked anyone to knock at the door or ask him permission to speak to him.

Like she thought, he completely closed himself off from any kind of positive contact here in his base. He just _survives_ the day, begrudgingly giving orders and moping in his secluded room.

Before opening the door, he stops to talk with Adahl and Alas; they look stunned, but he seems to insist about something, and so they slowly step away from the door, walking towards the dining hall, spears still in their hands and a baffled expression on their faces.

They bow at Scarlet, she bows back, and then she hears the door shut close. Solas has entered their room and she hopes he won’t cry there alone, haunted by his much stress and anxiety.

She is alone in the courtyard now and the sun is getting quite hot. She wonders again where this base is. Near Antiva, perhaps? She doesn’t remember the weather ever being so hot in the Free Marches, in the zones where her clan used to wander.

She finds an old stone bench near a small tree; its leaves offer a cold, welcomed shade, so she sits there, keeping an eye on the door and waiting for Solas to return. In the meantime, she counts the flowers at her feet and studies the embroideries on her clothes with expert eyes.

She knows he will come back this time, so the wait isn’t atrociously painful.

It doesn’t take long: soon the door opens again and her eyes quickly move to it, her mouth opens to call him and…

And then she sees the Solas she always saw every time she stepped into the rotunda: the Solas who wore a comfortable, light sweater she had made for him, the Solas who wore a pair of well-worn pants and walked barefooted.

The jawbone pendant isn’t there anymore. The armor is gone. There are just the sweater, the pants, and the soft straps he uses to cover the back of his bare feet.

He comes to her with a shy and satisfied smile and she can’t even get up; she stares at him from the bench, agape, and soon her eyes swell with tears.

“This is the first sweater you sent me, remember?” he says, touching the fabric with reverence. “I never had the chance to wear it before. It is very soft and beautiful.”

Then he sees and hears her cry, but he doesn’t panic. He sits next to her and wraps his arm around her shoulders, careful not to put too much weight on her wounded one. She leans on him and he strokes her cheeks with his thumb to dry her tears there.

“Since they all expect Fen’Harel to wear an armor,” he says with a smile, “I am sure they won’t be much surprised to see Solas wear this simpler attire.”

“I’m sure they will love it.” Scarlet giggles. She rubs her face on his chest, mumbling: “It fits you well.”

“It does. Your ability with the needle is astounding, _vhenan_.” He kisses her forehead, then her lips and says: “Now let’s go to eat. I do not want you to stay without food for too long.”

They get up, but before going Scarlet observes him for another minute or so, sniffling and blinking her eyes fast to push back her tears. Then she smiles at him, happy and proud, and says: “ _Ar lath, ma vhenan_.”

“I love you too, my heart.” he replies, cupping her cheeks and nuzzling her nose. He is smiling too. “Shall we go?”

He gets more anxious as they approach the doors of the dining room, but he takes a deep breath and manages to smile at her again when Scarlet takes his hand and squeezes it.

“Ready?” she asks, just like he asked her a few hours ago, before leaving their room.

“Ready.” he nods, then pushes the door opens.

The voices they could hear from outside become louder, now that they are actually there in the room, only to end abruptly with some gasps here and there.

A shocked silence falls and countless elven eyes move to where they stand. Scarlet feels a tinge of anxiety and panic as well and prays Solas won’t feel embarrassed or mortified.

All his agents, sitting at many long tables in the wide room, are gawking at them, but especially at _him_ and his new clothes, which they never saw him wear before. She distractedly spots the Sentinels in a far corner of the room, distanced from the others, and they are staring too.

“Don’t worry, it’s just like at Skyhold. Remember how we all ate together?” she whispers and Solas makes an affirmative, but high-pitched sound. He looks ready to bolt out of the room at any moment.

They have to move, to act. They have to break both this silence and this unbearable ice.

First, she starts by looking for an empty seat. She thinks she found one when suddenly someone gets up and waves at them from one of the farthest tables.

It’s Melana and Adahl and Alas, sitting at her same table, are looking at her as if she lost her mind.

“Lady Lavellan! Here!”

Scarlet smiles at them to let them know she heard, since she can’t wave back, then she turns to Solas, who is visibly surprised.

“See? We already made the first step.”

They physically make their first one inside the dining hall, hand in hand, and the agents nod at them and greet them as they pass by their tables.

Solas still looks nervous and on the verge of a panic attack, but when Scarlet thanks the three agents who welcomed them at their table and sits down without letting his hand go, his lips curl into a smile and he sits at her side, still holding her hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day! ( ´ ▽ ` ) I wanted to post something fluffier for this day, but this chapter was almost finished, so I decided to update this fic instead. Maybe I will write a short one-shot too!
> 
> The nobles causing problems to Dorian and the others will become relevant later. As you can imagine, many consider Solas/Fen'Harel the cause of the Qunari's new series of attacks and the Qunari really hate him as well, so they will all come up with something pretty bad... ಥ‿ಥ
> 
> Thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> This time I decided to openly mention my Lavellan, [Scarlet](http://lafaiette.tumblr.com/scarletlavellan), since I would write her no matter what even if her name wasn't mentioned. She is my child, after all, and I feel she deserves to be addressed fully ; v ;
> 
> I think this fic will have the same mood as Var Lath: sweet, sometimes funny and angsty, but ultimately hopeful. Many other characters will enter the scene - better yet, _the base_ -, everybody ready to show Solas what they discovered and learned, hoping to finally find the right method to tear down the Veil without killing everyone. Of course not all elves will agree on this.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this first chapter and forgive me for any typos! ; v ;


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